live simply

2007-11-08T08:28:00.000-08:00

watching a particular video always leaves me in tears.i've watched it 4 times,and each time i watch it,new things are being impressed upon my heart,new perspectives formed.and it all brings me back to the person that we all are.and it's heartening to know that God remains loving,despite the times we turn our backs on him,the times we fall into the arms of the other.the video's amazing.i have no idea where it was shot.it's brilliant!it just makes you realize.realize things,realize ur thoughts,ur emotions,and the workings of ur soul.

for the times i feel so used,so taken advantage of, i thank You Lord for those who so willingly make sacrifices just to see me through them, for those who sit down with me and listen.ve been going thru some really bad times.but looking at it in another perspective,it's all about connecting the dots,and surrendering to His plan.i can't say i'm overjoyed having to go thru all these.ughh.the times when your expectations are way up there,something comes along and shatters tt weak foundation your expectations are built upon.it's always something.anyhow, it's over and i guess wearing a mask is always good.i used to think it was being fake.heyy all in the name of self-defence man.

i'm seeing stars like satellites (:

2007-09-07T09:16:00.000-07:00

yoohoo!i just realised!i made it to the 100th post.heh after a very long while.
all's been good :) aft the much needed,in fact,a far too generous,3 month break,i'm back in sch.oweek was so much fun,the freshies and the time spent with the councillors.i'm gg to sound like i work for samsung,but seriously,it's all about creating memories tog.
i'm off to lime flea mkt again tmr to get rid of some very irritating clothes,and hopefully i will not be spending more than i earn this time round.and i hope ppl wldn't bargain so aggressively so i get to make some $.
just throwing out random stuff to type.i haven't read blogs in ages!well i do read one,it's the fashion police's blog.it's kind of funny to see celebs dressed in rags and really ill-fitting clothes.ohh!hairspray!felt there wasn't a balance between the whole musical drama thing and the storyline.it got a little on my nerves and i was kinda hoping for a commercial break.a pair of twins went up to dance during the last few scenes.it was so cute!oh they were about 4.so it was cute.can't imagine a pair of twins at erms,30 running down the aisle,dancing to 'me and baltimore'.shudders!
wellss,till i have another urge to type random stuff,toodles! :) be safe ppl

2007-07-18T08:27:00.001-07:00

kids can be so trying.it's not easy being a primary sch teacher.and i have no idea why they can talk so loudly.they're not even trying to shout.it's a miracle.

but the p1 and 2s are just so charming.i saw the most pretty/handsome pair of twins in my p2 class today.just like my timothy :) they're in sg now but i haven't had the time to visit.

i was on the verge of slapping this p4 boy.mann he's terrible!he thinks the world of himself,finds fault in everything and it's not like he has what it takes to act this way.i know i ought not to be so uptight over a kid,because he is a kid afterall.ugh he just takes the breath out of me.turns out his dad speaks this way too.interesting enough eh.

was grumbling and amy's reply was so simple.love them with the love of God.i've got to try to see them through His eyes and not my own.i can never,but i can pray and trust that He will show me them through His eyes.

ms ong has been really nice to me :)
oh the little things that make me pull through -

2007-07-15T07:33:00.000-07:00

many events behind my back now.it sort of leaves you deflated.

hope they had fun ytd.nv knew there was so much to do,so many things to forsee,and many more things to decide upon.and it's like you can't just make a hasty decision because you're not the only one bearing the consequences.and there's always the finances to think abt.but i enjoyed the whole process.i thank God for the wonderful comm.hahas 'you guys have the dream comm la!' and i believe so :) we were just talking abt the weeks leading to THE event on fri.i know everyone does tt.like a pre-event talk.all the 'i can't believe how far we've come since the 1st meeting','wow,it's finally here' and stuff like that.no matter how cliche it sounds,it's true.there were times when i really dreaded meetings.i wldn't know what we had to discuss,i wldn't know who's gg to turn up.a lot of uncertainty,a lot of 'what-ifs' and 'maybe we cld do it another week'.but it has been good.and i thank God for still blessing the event though we didn't centre out event on Him.it was just a mad rush of things to do,pub to attract ppl,reg to see to.maybe it's just me,but for the past weeks since reg started i find myself constantly worrying abt pub/reg during serv.if it's gg to turn out the way it shld,if we cld grab the table before alpha youth did.hahas.but it was all good

and now i'm just deflated -

the underground min sounds good to me.i think it's necessary.sth so simple to do,and yet so detrimental in some ways.i just need time -

so i'm off,and it'll prolly be another month before i'm back again to rant.hahas.

2007-06-22T09:29:00.000-07:00

2007-05-25T06:32:00.000-07:00

i gave up blogging since blogger didn't autosave my post the last time round.it's such a put off,to click on 'publish' and not see anything appear.

still jobless,still spending as if i own diamonds,still bumming around like the bum that i am.caught the zouk flea market last sun.the lighting was terrible,i cld hardly tell orange from purple.there was a lot of smoke and dogs.ya,dogs.as in real dogs(bark!).i wldn't want my dog to be sniffing in that amount of 2nd-hand smoke.i think it's a paris hilton thing.dogs make great accessories when their dressed oddly,and it's better yet if they're really small and don't move much.i mistook a small pomeranian for a pile of clothes and got quite a scare when tt 'pile of clothes' moved and sort of stared at me.managed a few good buys.sher bought super a lot.i'm just amazed.hahas.4 inched heels and what have you-s.and so i spent many days flinging my crisp notes at different shopowners.and now the good old mongolian wallet's as thin as can be.wootss.

contract signing was quite an eye opener.i wonder if my name card's still at the office.it was a tad odd but nevertheless an experience.

spent some time pracking.heh.funn!triton rocks.its got many different sounds and effects.and frm then there have been many opportunities to play and i thank God for that!stopped twinkling on the ivories for close to a year.pracs are always funn,except i'm always alone at the side!it's a terrible set-up,but apparently it's supposed to do the sound good.my eyes were opened to the passion that they have for music,in creating an all-round worship experience.and i'm so amazed at technology.sort of makes me feel a bit cheated for all the money spent on CDs.hahas.whenever i think of edited sounds i think of britney spears.like i can just imagine how edited her CD is!every out-of-pitch note,lip smacking,wrong word sung -- edited!

there's bananarama,gdop,and the jy-yf event.and hopefully a job.hehh.went for an interview today.it's such a waste of my time!and ya,i didn't get the job in the end.it's for a 2day private fashion show.

i always lose my train of thoughts after a while.so long,farewell!

2007-05-08T07:30:00.000-07:00

2007-04-19T07:45:00.000-07:00

yeayy.i just felt like writing a little.haven't been writing for the longest time.nah.i don't count writing reports as writing.writing for reports is quite restrictive,there's a certain sentence structure you have to use,cos u're writing from a fixed point of view.and the content just isn't as exciting,and you probably don't feel much for half the things that you type.

everyone's mugging.and i shld be too.half the time i don't know what i'm reading.and yes,it's thursday already.well,almost friday since 12 isn't too far away from now.it's quite scary knowing that some people actually start their papers tmr,while i gala away till tue.

the sem has been pretty much ok.things are a little changed,thou some things remain pretty much the same.i've become accustomed to many little things that used to bother me a lot.there's this change from within,it liberates me and gives me joy :) and i know where that joy comes from.i enjoy flagging 51,spot my favourite seat,plug in to nice music and just watch the world pass me by.i enjoy the hour long solitude.it's interesting to see the people who board the bus,try to guess what's on their minds.my projs were ok.just a little erpss abt stuff here and there.challenges!that i overcame.blissful.

wish i cld write more.but time's up!back to books again.wheess!

2007-04-06T09:14:00.000-07:00

6 weird things about me wells i got tagged by chris, and i've got to tag 6 other persons who gotta do the same things. so here goes.
ayee.but i'm not gg to tag 6 other ppl.no time.hahas.

1. i used to replay scenes in my head in front of a mirror.erms,like scenes from the day.stuff tt i've said, the expressions i've made.i really want to know how i look like when i'm laughing like mad.come on.i bet you do too!

2. i love the smell of my bolster!thou my mum think it stinks.

3. i cry a lot.i cry when i'm angry, when i'm arguing, when i'm happy, when i'm feel God moving, when i hear God, when i'm in His presence, when movies show scenes of parental love, of kinship. i cry.

4. i love my daddy and mummy a lot.thou i haven't said 'i love you' to them since, hmms, since i was pri 3? well i just write 'i love you' on cards. but it doesn't quite equal. i love my friends a lot.thou i don't usually say much. i love the people i know a lot.

5. i'm a KPO. i think i make a good detective.

6. me loves chad kroeger's voice a lot. it just makes me feel happy. it kinda soothes things a little.

right now,i wld really want to blast some of nickelback.gaah.
realise these things aren't really weird.hahas.just felt like writing them.alrightss.take care ppl.mug hard.

2007-02-27T07:56:00.000-08:00

haven't been updating :) well,all's fine,good and going.
the mid term break was much needed.not tt sch has been tt tt busy,i just wanted to get away from it all.frm the monotonous "wake up,rush to board 334,rush to board 51 and scurry here there and everywhere".i'm thankful for the small things tt lift me up,for the ppl who suddenly appear in my way and lift my spirits.i've grown quite a bit since i don't know when.it's really in experiencing it,that you come to appreciate small things,however small they may be,for its impact in ur life,and not deem it as insignificant just because it is simply,a small thing.like how i'm happy when i get to sit at my favourite seat on 51,when my mp3 works and the battery decides not to die on me half way thru the journey.like how solitude warms my heart these days.i enjoy solitude :) thou i'm still very much the dependent old girl.i depend on Him :)

had a really long talk with felly welly and i'm just glad we did.am glad for the talks i had with kang on plans,on direction regarding f comm.am glad for the sharing amongst the few of us on sat.am greatly encouraged by what they shared,and how i can learn from their experience.

i just feel there's so much more.so much more to what we see day-to-day.so much more to weekly meetings,to weekly updates frm each other.there is so much more to this thing known as a relationship amongst people.it's fantastic,it's amazing,and we were created to complement it.

cannot thank God enough for what He has done in me

2007-01-31T06:23:00.000-08:00

"what scares you most?"

yepp thought i'll just change away the orangy temp.i still love orange,just thought i'd get sth milder.

snipped off my hair.glad tt it was a gd haircut.the trauma of getting my fringe snipped still stays with me,and no,i am nv going back to tt salon just opposite my place.no no no,not even if they start giving out 50%discount coupons,no.i'm happy with the cut.feeling pretty.ohh just let me gloat for a while.

seen the dove advert on tv?i think it's a really gd move.i wonder why girls are always the ones more susceptible to self-esteem problems.why do we always see ourselves as too fat,ugly,and not measuring up to the worldly criteria of beauty.i think it's sad.as much as i support dove's stand on true beauty,i doubt the self-esteem fund wld help much.the fund just means there will be more resources going ard schs,teaching lil' girls that they are beautiful.but it isn't going to change mindsets.and i think as girls,we shld stand by fellow girls.not like stand by them only aft they're diagnosed with bulimia and the what-have-yous.it just pains me whenever i see the dove ads.but yeay,they brought out a superb point.

IT is driving me quite mad.legal is too.wonder if it's my lack of effort put in.ah wellss.life's peaceful as of now.i like it thou i'm always asking for more.contentment.it's sth i've got to learn.

yepp.so really,what scares you most?

2007-01-14T07:44:00.000-08:00

funny how i always have a lot to say while the page is loading,then when it finally appears,i totally have no idea whatsoever on whatever i intended to write.oh poo!i just dropped another strand of hair :( having some really bad out break of large,gross pimples on my chin.it's really irritating cos it's huge and lumpy.eew.

many events,many outcomes,many after-thoughts,few changes.PLUNGE was a blast,but the whole spiritual high thing didn't really apply to me.guess it's the same for a few of us in the comm.there's always this feeling of being slightly detached from it.no doubt we all had our own encounters,but for us,it prolly wasn't at camp itself,it was during the days leading to camp.then there was altitude.rotten papayas really stink.i bet they use them in stink bombs,you know,those you can buy in pri sch bookshops for abt 30cents a pack or so.hahas.you could try lacing your doorway with rotten papayas,now that would really keep the burglars away!watchnight,and 07 arrived.

loads of last minute catching up here and there before sch starts proper.bidding,catching buses,trains.the night at pk's.the crazy game of cranium,the not very pleased waiter,and the worst costume party theme ever!wellss i had funn.a lot of funn.nth beats this silly group of ppl:) took a trip back to grey's with xunn.ohh i figured grey's is a cooler way of referring to nj,rather than just saying nj.ahhas.band room's changed a bit.thou i adore the orange walls,the brand new piano,the new instruments,the pretty harp still standing,the cutesy puffy furry bedroom slippers,somehow the cosy,homely feel of the room's gone.disappeared,poof!ohh they have a tuned guitar as well!how blissful.sch's changed a bit.it's so colourful i thought i stepped into a pri sch.lt5's be redone and it's how high class now.days of us shuffling to lt-s for lects,spotting our friends and shouting and waving,our unstoppable small talks during lects.ahh.it's just kinda different now.

anyhowss i'm so brave.i sat alone for one lect.i'm pass the 'i feel lonely' stage.it feels quite ok to go home alone,walk to the 'loser' bus stop and take the bus back.it's just a matter of getting used to aye.it's just different.but i cld get used to that i think.nahh.i'm not making sense.

probably everything will soothe out.probably the creases that spoil the fabric will go away:) who else fills my cup till it overflows?undignified was awesome.i experienced a breakthrough,in a way.it's in knowing,it's in believing,it's in holding on to Him.and i will.

talk abt 07 being THE year for us,youths amassed tons of excitement.but we don't feel excited just because we keep talking abt it.

2006-12-04T04:43:00.000-08:00

yeayness!i just got caught up with work ppl!hahas.i'm still in sg.wellss i'm leaving on thurs.to port dickson!i nv knew such a place existed.seemed like it was just a name for a port.but ta-da!it's in erms,i think it's east msia!i'm looking forward to the durian trees.i hope durians are in season now.
wellss.i thank God for seeing me through the exams.don't remember myself studying like this during the As.papers were here and there.accounting was so funny cos it was far too hard.like there wasn't much to be done except laugh and feel sorry that our balance sheet doesn't really balance.ah the beauty of accounting.and this is the last i wld see of cutesy dr chng!
it's freedomm today!met felly welly and we had such a time doing crazy ugly stuff.i'm glad we don't stay ard tt area so no one recognises us :) yeayss.ask me abt our christmas song!hahas.
camp's ard the corner!much excitment,expectations,and anticipation of what God will do.many many.
don't think i'll be updating for a while.hahas.so have funn people! :)

2006-11-12T06:30:00.000-08:00

such yeayness.wendy came over from ntu and we all transformed into our usual noisy,aunty selves.it's been a long long time since we gathered.thou the 3 of us are in the same sch.schedules have been difficult to fit.we took many many pretty photos.pity i forgot how to use photoshop.i forgot how to resize photos.ha!i'll forever be the IT tortise.ah wellss.ahh.it was such a happy day.not to mention the walk in the rain.ermss.which was something rather undesired for.hahas.

my house floor exploded!it's just oh so highly amusing.there was this great big lump at my place a while back.l said it'll explode after a while.and i thought it was quite impossible.hahas.it exploded when we were in church and my frightened and traumatized maid called my mum.hahas.wellss.it's just funny.so who thinks i'll be shifting house soon?

we had cell sharing ytd.we were talking abt our passions and it's uncanny how most of us had this passion for people.

i especially liked today's sermon.felt it came really timely.and i like the way pastor puts it.the years that we are struggling,we are actually growing roots.at least i know i'm not struggling now for nth.still feeling fearful despite praying abt it,and telling myself to just be bold.ytd was this bout of terrible-ness.i always get it when i'm playing.or maybe it's just my mindset.anyhowss i'm nevertheless glad for lifts along the way.

terrorism essay is the grossest thing i've ever done.i shall take a sci mod nxt sem.study people.welcome to the land of the muggertoot :)

2006-11-08T06:40:00.000-08:00

in splits and splats

deliberate

tiring

response

irks me

the comfort zone

the usual few

the good old times

2006-10-19T07:43:00.000-07:00

wonder if there's anything wrong with my explorer.there's this cp box thing that keeps popping up.it's quite irritating,considering the number of times i have to click on cancel before it actually disappears.

it's the pia-till-you-drop season once again.nv knew it was this exciting.sleeping is such such such a luxury.i just need to know how to get rid of my panda eyes once this season's over.panda eyes are nv the in look.really!some make up artist should just make it the 'it' look,and yeayss,who cares if yours are natural or put on.baaa.time's slipping away.no more luxurious wednesdays where i get to do my own stuff,at my own time.

and it seems that i haven't improved on my driving skills.i still drive badly :( i've got 3 more months.it should do.

today was an exceptional day.other than the fact that i was terribly late for lecture,but hey!there's someone even later than me la.and she left very quickly aft settling down.hmms.i saw pretty dress!hahas.and i think accounting has gotten into our heads.was just commenting that i didn't have enough cash anyway to buy pretty stuff from the bazaar (it's super ex i tell you) and we exclaimed in delight upon thinking about notes receivables!accounting!

i thank God for seeing me thru my mid terms!phew.it's one hurdle down.and many more to come.but at least it's over.horrorss!

the past weeks have been good,really.despite certain things happening,certain thoughts that got me down,but He has placed a few to pick up pieces of me.it's been great.sher's all safe in canada,enjoying snow and the cold.her mum's so cute!right.tt's not the point.hahas.anyhowss.i'm just so thankful.

baa i feel bad for not saying much.i always tell myself to think about the items,but it always comes before i realise it.wellss.disciplinnee.

2006-10-04T08:53:00.000-07:00

apologies for the onslaught of many depressing entries of the recent.

recess wk's well,done and over with.so much for a break.i went swiming.wheess swim like a fish with a slimyy tail.watched john tucker with sher,shopped,girly talk and girly lunch at billybombers.and yes,the usual project meetings and discussions.i'm beginning to speak out more,air my views.it's quite a change.quite enjoy discussions as of now.yes i know,wait till the proj deadlines draw near and i'll be changing my mind.

john tucker is quite a lousy chic flick.i love chic flicks.but the plot was quite eew.and ashanti looks weird in most of her costumes on the set.but guess what.i still love chic flicks.yeayss to that.sher and i forgot our change.so we had to desperately ask the aunty if she remembered us.hahas.we felt so bimbo after getting our tickets we forgot all about our change.and we got cheated at billy bombers.ah wellss.i love sher.but she's off to canada in a couple of days.what's wrong with singapore dearss!

a qn that led me to think about a lot of things.it got me feeling depressed for a couple of days.but i'm good.i thank God for the friend that dropped me a note,which was so timely and so nicely written.i thank God for the friend who told me that when u've stepped out of all these,u'll enter into another after a while.patience,prolly the lesson i have to draw from all these.

sometimes i wonder and i ask furiously,why are these events timed at such terrible intervals.meaning at no intervals at all.they accumulate,they snowball.and when it finally reaches its peak,it flows.everything requires me to change,to adapt.guess i'm just not adapting fast enough urh.

mails regarding camp have been really encouraging.esp the one on 3youths coming for camp thou they haven't been coming for the past 3 yrs.it's really God in the works mann.i hope some minds change.and poly ppl,pon lessons la!

yeayss for ah pigss who always reads me super well,and accurately.yeayss for all her in my face words.which i really need from time to time.yeayss ahpigss!

yuppss.i know i'm closing up.and i shldn't let it happen.but we'll see la.sometimes it's easier to not say anything.

2006-09-24T06:58:00.000-07:00

awww.no one does freedom like hadyy!go hady.this yr's grand finals was quite a let down.was expecting at least 2hrs of singing,frm the top 2 and the top 12.and it was just an hour and a half,and very poorly planned.poor gurmit.i think he was a bundle of nerves.wonder why.but he seems to be tumbling over all his lines and stuff.ah wellss.i would be too if i had to face thousands of ppl.everyone's got their eyes on you.lalala.mann.i'm in the mood for feel good songs.

met sher for breakfast.i'm going to be so lonely.it's so depressing!i miss vonne.i miss pau.i'm going to miss sher and clarise.and just when i got to know each of them at a different level.this is so gross.prolly tt's why the need for feel good songs.

i see and feel a change in me.and i really thank Him for giving me this opportunity to be serving in the comm.thou there are times when i feel tt i'm not really contributing much,i hold on to the belief that He has a purpose and a role for me in there.so i'm holding on.i love felly welly so much.she's such a dearr!glad they're expressing interest in coming for camp.because it's going to be so good.
still at a stage of finding myself.in that place.it's like zapping me back to 2yrs ago when i first entered a brand new environment,entirely on my own.just that now i'm zapping myself to this refresh page.i've been here my whole life.but it doesn't seem this way.it's here there and everywhere.used to ask why a lot.and i realise i can't keep asking why.i've got a part to play.it's going to be so trying.so much harder because i've been here since day 1.but really what's 1st impressions,what's lasting impressions.wipe it all away!

laughter that hides silent cries.tt really spoke to me today.how true.don't we all?

2006-09-19T09:54:00.000-07:00

hope dark eye rings won't come to haunt me in the near future.wonder what's the consequences for sleeping late.had problems sleeping recently.and as a friend puts it,i'm missing out on lots of slumber funn.i toss and turn till 4plus in the morning.and by the time i officially enter into my dear old la-la land,my alarm rings and as the story goes,i jump out of bed and i'm late for my lect.missed half of my 1hr tut today.muttered a sorry and a gave tight lipped smile.not that the tutor reacted.guess she must have been very deep in thought.

zen sort of makes me laugh.no offense to anyone,but how does someone meditate on nothingness.doesn't meditating require you to think?and if u're thinking,how can you say you're thinking of nothing.i mean surely you must be thinking of something before you can qualify yourself as thinking ritess!

SU SU SU!i'm clinging onto the hope that the geisha portion of the module would be more interesting than what is being covered now.

i've become accustomed to long bus rides.made use of the rides to think,to review.we all need a reality check don't we.realised i've changed in my perceptions,in my viewpoints.like the things mee and dee did in the past,seemed more reasonable now.

there's always this constant drone of 'i'm lagging behind' in my head.wonder if i'm hallucinating.sadly i'm not.it's so true.ah wellss.accounting is not worth it!hahas.

how true that times change,situations change,even the world changes *come on,look at dear old pluto,it's no longer a planet* but Your Word and You nv change.and i take comfort in this.

those is places other than hot,humid,IMF-in-the-progress singapore,youu babess take care alrightss.and pls do come back in dec.

no more the sad life.it's all abt taking the first step.sighh.i must have grown more thick skinned thru the months.

i'm gg to master driving and beat everyone in daytona.hahas.no.tt's just dumb.i'm gg to master driving so i pass and don't waste money.tt's more like it.and after passing,it's the qn of how am i gg to wrestle the car keys out of my dad's hands.i'll think abt it.

wheess.here's to fantastic days ahead,loads of funn amidst notes and books,and sleeep!

2006-09-01T10:51:00.000-07:00

in the 1930s the great depression was a period of gloom and doom for the world economy.
today,the great depression is still a period of gloom and doom,for me.

i've come to realise that things are not always in your favour.things aren't for certain.things can change.things will change.things can make and break you and it's all up to you to choose the route you take for yourself.i cld sucuumb to giving up entirely,or i cld be really thick skinned and hopefully strike it out.
where is the secure and normal and funn environment i used to have.guess it all starts out different.
i really needed to hear things into my face and i'm glad for the talk today.minus the many smokers,ants and leaves.i need to face up to my feelings.and somehow or another i need to open up.no point thinking too much nowadays.no one's going to remember much of you with everyone taking different paths aft a few months.

we went high just now.being too depressed made us swing right to the other extreme.
heyss i feel bad for always not being able to be there.but i will try to ya.don't like to say yes and end up over-promising.so the nxt time i say yes it's really a yes.

i'm really looking forward to dec.it's going to be good,better than good.it's going to be radical.and i like how it sounds so far.yeayness.we need Your touch!

i was trying to pronounce this 'passiton' and i realise it's just 'pass it on' joined together.coolness.we need to just break things up urh.

we're all in the same boat and we will survive.i'm good.

met the bandeess.they make me so happy.it's been super long since i laughed so hard.so long since i laughed at real humour.

xunss i shld nv try fan zuo zi in nus.i bet ppl will stare at me and make me even weirder than they think i already am.hahas.

2006-08-31T08:22:00.000-07:00

yeayss.is everyone proud of meee!hahas.i survived my first tutorial alone.i must have blabbed this to tons of people.so let me do this again urh.i survived.hahas.and i'm going to survive tmr's bsp tutorial alone too manss.starting to get the hang of it.bring it on i say.on second thoughts,maybe not.
anyhowss i feel like i'm starting to get really behind time on the lects and stuff.it's scary how smart some ppl are.and how vocal they are.it's a mild and good shock i guess.i'll prolly learn how to speak up a lot more.yes i'm still super irritated with printing notes.
pau left for italy on tue.sadness.only dor and i went.we were trying very hard to be with the rest of pau's mates.but somehow we sucumbed to anti-socialness.pau take care okayss!
sometimes it's best to just trash things out.i'm glad for the bus ride today.some stuff were clarified and it felt good.i love trashing sessions thou they always do not imply that nice things happened.
dinner was good!hahas.i'm surprised uuu guys cook la.fantastical.thou many items looked suspicious.

i really need to stop being the lazy cow i am.

2006-08-21T04:34:00.000-07:00

i hate printing notes.hate printing readings.it takes up so much of my time so much ink and so much paper.i feel for my printer.it's hacking away as it's printing the final few pages of stats.tsk tt flowery powerpoint slide.

anyhowss i'm into the second week.was wondering why everyone's so stressed.and now i know why.tons of readings,even before tutorials start proper.i shudder to think of how it'll be like when everything starts swinging into action.8months of working/bumming ard has its fruits.now is not the time to enjoy its fruits.aye aye!

i'm still irritated with printing notes!

nothing extremely exciting has been happening in my oh so boring and monotonous life.biz bash was normal.was a pity we gave up our spot at the dance floor.still funn.thou sometimes i feel as if my skin's as thick as a snake's.we cld hardly see those pageant ppl.so we were contented with our small standing table and a couple of free drinks.whooperss for us.

can the stats lecturer use less cutesy fonts!it's eating me.

rright.pardon tt outburst.

breakfast with sher was great.we should do tt more often.provided i get a ride to church frm dad and mum.hohoho.pity the madem shop we wanted to see wasn't open at 11.nxt time thenss.and i'm sure i will drop by b&j's this sat!

scaryyness.

yeayness.i'm using a mac!it's so so pweety.and it's so nice to type can.wheess.i hope i get my tutorial slots!hall rockss.hahas.

2006-08-16T07:54:00.000-07:00

wellss it's been 2 days since lectures started.cldn't wake up in time for my 10am lect ytd and i ended up sitting between strangers.not having lecture notes and not being able to see the screen was terrible.all i saw thruout the whole 2hrs was heads,heads and more heads.i ended up looking at the stuff ppl wear to school and trying to use my corner stare to read the cleo mag beside me than listening to the prof talk abt accounting.yes i should really start listening to lectures.and blame it on the rain.we had to walk the long way to the arts fac.the lecturer was quite funny and it sort of changed my mind about taking tt mod.stats was just amusing.she was talking in a super high pitch voice and all.

i see oh happy days disappearing.i see gg home alone saying hi!sigh.the life of an anti social ayee.

meeting was great.it's amazing how God impressed upon us the same points.how each of our points linked to become one big picture.whoopeess.it's going to be so explosive.the flying fox idea was really funny.oh happy days!

can't wait to watch my lovely samsoon.it's so bridget jones.what amazes me is how the both of them can put on like 15pounds for the show,and then loose some 25pounds after the show.they should really come teach me!

seriously!swimming at bukit batok is rather irritating.can't believe guys,yes guys!,actually tan themselves at the swimming pool.they don't swim,but lie at the perimeters of the pool.i had to literally hop my way to the pool.funkiness.they make quite good decorations for the poolside.seriously!please swim.water and sun makes uuu tanner a lot faster!ah wellss.don't trust the sun tan oils.

i pray for His wisdom to be upon me.

hope vonness and hannyss are doing great.really,ppl shouldn't go overseas.kays.i'm just saying this cos i miss my friends.but going overseas is truly an experience.

hope this is more than funn,more than just obligations.

2006-08-03T09:05:00.000-07:00

yeayss.just bidded and i felt really pro.hohoho.i'm so glad for zhishaohaiyouni,so glad for the few friends i've known,glad that we decided on abt the same stuff.wonder if my bids will be successful.
pardon me.
it's a whole new experience.ppl frm all over,the east,the north,and i still think the west is the best.sounds terribly primary school i know.but there is a difference between the west and the east ppl.seriously.maybe it's the air,or the water supplies.
ppl that i wish i nv see again,tones i wish they'd nv use on me,looks that are cast my way.i pray tt i will be strong enough to stay to my identity in Christ,to be very sure of what i am.the networking word's been seriously overused.so much for fun,so much for getting acquainted.
i'm feeling super insecure and i really hate it.i hate feeling uncertain,feeling alone,helpless and wishing i'd disappear.it's sth i struggle with,then and now.ughss.it just irks me when things aren't all strawberry sundaes and smooth.
grp's new.a lot more ppl,hope it'll be a lot more funn.but some impressions are fixed.so eekss to that,and i hope it'll disappear.
at a stage where i'm really uncertain of everything,feeling myself wanting to escape real bad.i shld seriously consider being a recluse,pity it doesn't look nice on my CV eh.i'd miss days i wake up at 12plus,laze around,bang a little on the ivories,slowly take my brunch,and curl up on the settee with a good read.
hope i am what i was made to be.
hear these frm a lost and tired soul

2006-07-28T08:54:00.000-07:00

the cute little tang yuan boy at guangzhou.he is so so adorable.thou i didn't know what language he spoke.i tried chinese,english,and even cantonese.he just smiled and laugh whenever he felt like it.kids are just so adorable.

once in a while,it's nice to look at random photos tt make you happy.

medical check up was a nightmare.we didn't know where to queue,didn't know we had to pay,didn't know we had to report back aft lunch.even lunch was a disaster.somehow or another our wonderful ice lemon tea decided to do a funky tango number and slided off the table.ahha.not impressed.and consultation was so so bad.i felt like a chicken being marinated for barbecue.it must be the gloves.so traumatic.thank God it's over and done with.yeayss.

birthday celebration was funn.not exactly the filled-with-activities funn.more of catching-up-laugh-and-look-back funn.i hope she likes the bag!

dinner was funn.who is going to have dinner with me every saturday aft you're goneee!i can't find anyone else who can crap as well as you do!who can stand my ultimate i don't get it-s,rubbish and what notss.really,what's wrong with singapore manss!why is everyone flying off!tsk tsk!where else do youu get durianss!

bidding is so confusing.fastest fingers first sounds a lot better.sometimes i really regret this.ahhh.there is always a reason for it!

seriously,ditzy girls shldn't be allowed in society.ahh.i so cannot stand them.

2006-07-18T08:00:00.000-07:00

sentosa's beauutiful!took this weeks ago.yeayss.let's go sentosa someday!

had tons of fun that day with hannyss and xunss.

just sitting in the sand,basking under the sun,

talking just about anything and everything,

trying really hard to sound damn pro in shan hu hai,

fishing the seaweed out of the way,

play tt lousy pepsi cola game,

and playing games with our feet.

it was nice to hear frm her!glad she's settling in well.

hope orientation will be funn!

went for rag today.

whooss.it felt really nice to see the two walls done up so nicely!

clapss to those who stayed over

impressive!

it was funn.sort of i guess.hahas.

had this convo some time back

my friend was wondering why i'm not quiet,anti-social,

as most of his only child friends are.

so many ppl are interested in the life of an only child

hahas.yeayss.

but i guess it's all the same.

i admit i'm spoilt,i don't wash dishes very much

even my babes don't allow me to wash them alone,

for fear tt i may leave oil stains and what notss.

i can't cook,save for eggs and instant noodles.

but i don't always get my way.

ahha.you thought i will ritess.

nah,tough luck.

anyhowss i don't suppose being the only child

will make youu really quiet.

i always thought uuu'll be even noisier,

cos everyone's attention's on youu.

i dream of having siblings sometimes.

hahas

we are so lazyy!

hahas.

we are hoping someone will come save us,

tell us everything we need to know abt uni,

all the admin stuff,

bidding of modules,

and settle everything for us!

dang i missed the date for the pay thru cpf thingy

pay in cash?!

tt's madness la.

yeayss i'm so glad she's back!

God answers prayers!

i love bumming ard

with all the time in the world.

ahhh

i hope sch doesn't start!

was hoping for uni to start at the beginning of the yr

but the longer the wait,

the more i dread it

my brain's really rustyy

i see the cobwebs

i will never walk alone :)

2006-07-09T06:36:00.000-07:00

i love this photo xunss did on photoshop.it's pretty and it reminds me of all things nice,funky,happy and blessed.concert was great ytd.wellss the novelty of playing in esplanade dies off after a while.love the dressing room toilet!some wayang thingy was on-going so we saw loads of funky wayang made up ppl at the links.this heavily made up guy in pink was sitting on some stool when we went for dinner.and guess who we saw when we came back?yes it's him again.in the exact same position.hmms.interesting.i suspect he fell asleep.
i love playing on stage.love the spotlight,love playing with the whole band.i thought wizard of oz was wonderfully played at the end.yeayss.i'm a bandee and i'm so proud of it!

bye hannyss!think going overseas really suits her la.hahas.the 'i'm independent and i don't care if my luggage is bursting' type.i pray tt she'll enjoy aus,with all their rooss and ice cream,get an aussie accent,learn surfing and all the likes.i pray tt she'll walk even closer to God,letting Him guide her way.hannyss is greatly missed.i hope she looks at the calender we made her and thinks about us everyday.muackss youuu hannyss!

particulaly liked the video showed today.the father's love for his son was so great he trained so hard just to fulfil his son's wish.how much more is His love for us.

anyhowss.driving is super funn.everyone shld starting driving manss!zoom zoom.

2006-07-02T07:10:00.000-07:00

i moan the loss of brazil.ughss.i'm not interested in world cup anymore.guess it's the uncertainty in all sports.a small slip.it's ok.we'll see them win 4yrs later!ahhhs.

the wk's been good.i went shopping with my ever funky grandma.people's park is filled with oldiess!it's like their orchard la.hahas.there's this really pretty shop that sells all sorts of laces,buttons and belt buckles.so uuu cld actually get urself a belt and yes,it's really cheap.why do you think i wld buy stuff there then.i still don't get why aunties love OG so much.the flowery blouses blinded me.

had a long discussion with dad and mum abt the way they brought me up.i think i see things more from their point of view now.dang.does tt mean i'm growing older!eekss.dad said some really wise stuff.we prolly think we're quite smart and all.but sometimes we're just over-estimating ourselves.adults and teens alike.and whoever said being the only child is a bliss is seriously disturbed.i do love my daddy and mummy!

we did self-esteem at cell ytd.made me re-evaluate the way i see myself.the way i feel about certain issues.yes yes it's our esteem in Christ.

i visited them!we had loads of funn at level10.shall go back to work during uni hols.i like the feeling of making money.hahas.it's dreadful to know that my bank account's dwindling week by week.rright.gss is so not gg to make me spend!i miss the aunties there.hahas.aunty normah is super concern abt reks' and my love life.it's so funny la.she was teaching us tactics to yes yes,get a boyfriend.the funny things she says!didn't get to see all of them thou.their leave days.met the gang at beach road.i met fake freshiee!hahas.so cheat my money la.i shall work again!

ohss.fhm's list of the 100sexiest babes isn't impressive.melody chen?eekss.mischa burton definitely deserves a higher standing!

i've made the decision.so whatever happens i entrust it into His Hands

dang.i am not dao,not anti-social,not quiet!i'm gg to be so enthu abt og outings.kays.at least i think i will try.ha!depends.i shld just stop formulating such extreme views within a day or so.it's irritating how ppl get worse as they grow older.they shld just stop it manss.

i will miss hannyyss!

2006-06-27T01:03:00.000-07:00

wheess.i've been kept busy!i like it when i'm busy.i forget,i get distracted and i guess i'm happyy!

the outing for the blind was wonderful.there is absolutely nth to worry abt when you place it in God's Hands.thou it was a saturday,and yes yes,it was the june hols,we managed to secure more than enough bikes for them.and whooperss we have so many experienced cyclists!me not included.booss.hahas.no bbq but yeayss to the bento sets.yeayss to the grp of strangers who allowed us to dine at their pit for more than an hour.until this guy came up to us,very aptly dressed in his ermss pink boxers,and asked if we were done.buddies handled every particpant really well.and it's super encouraging to watch.i was blessed.

rright.camp was for four loong days.it's been long since i'm in a camp as a camper.ah wellss.i'll keep it short.prolly every living thing ard me has heard this.hahas.what's up la!4 yrs really can't be that long urh.if God places me there,i believe He has things in store for me.and i'll hold on to this.it'll be like the only thing keeping me sane in there.

i heard things that made me really happy.and yes i've come to a decision.
i saw things that made me disgusted.wrong judgement.people who do things for the sake of aye,sth.heyss i hope this tires uuu out man.

yeayss i'm gg back tmr!heard it got really busy aft i left.i get to taste nice beach road food again.

there are loads of choices to make nowadays.and it keeps me thinking.so ughss pls distract me!

ohss did i say this.i'm so glad for friends who so willingly act ugly and stupid.so glad for friends who don't care how ugly or unglam they look.so so glad for friends who are more than skin deep.so glad for friends who don't judge.so glad.

2006-06-09T07:39:00.000-07:00

yeayss!i'm happyy.

bananarama is so so funn.every kid shld attend tt camp manss.i felt as if i was back to primary sch.where the water coolers are all so short.hahas.i love my jumping bananas!we won first!yeayss.the 8 kids tt i had in my grp were all lovely.adrian looked so much like evan.almost like twins.it was hilarious the way adrian gave everyone a nickname and somehow sean ended up being sexy woman.which is,ahems,very apt indeed.hahas.melissa is so endearing!she's really smart for her age.and then there's nadia,lynette,kheehock,and yanyan.wellss.lynette reminds me so much of myself when i was 10!whoots.realise it's exceptionally tiring trying to gather 8 kids into a straight line.they are just so bursting with energy!

have been tied up with the outing.it's such a joy.i am so so impressed by their sensitivity to sound and to touch.yeayss.i pray tt the outing will be sth they enjoy and that they can feel God's love thru us!i wasn't expecting ICs or AHDHs.it will be a challenge.and it will be exciting.

somehow i feel like i've been quite anti.hahas.alright.blame me.

2006-05-30T21:03:00.000-07:00

whooperss.i'm back!resting in the comfort of my home has nv been more blissful than this.bangkok was a swirl of activity.every other day i see cars piling on the roads,ppl walking faster than cars and motorbikes alike.wellss.shopping was great.mummy went a bit high and bought so many tshirts.a bit scary seeing ur mum getting more hyped up than you when it comes to shopping aye.i mean i'm supposed to be the more excited one!hahas.mummy bought a lot.and yes,i must stress,a lot.trucks full of tshirts,pants,bags and more bags.and heyss who says guys wld be bored stiff in bangkok.daddy will prove you wrong man.hahas.anyhowss.i thank God for providing us with this ability to enjoy bangkok,to enjoy touring and stuff.and yes,the financial comfort.but read this,i am not rich.i'm just blessed.

but i got pickpocketed.eekss.if there's such a word.yes,scream,be shocked.tt guy was so skilled.he slit open my bag,and yes,it was a straight and sleek cut,stole my fake orange gucci wallet with 1000baht in it,and my free pouch!i do hope what he finds in the pouch wld give him a big big scare.i didn't even recall anyone coming near to me or pushing me or anything.eekss!the only time i recall not holding my bag close to me was when this guy slided over the uneven floors of chatchuchak.he had one leg.and he was sliding on the floor like a snake.the floor's damn hot,dirty and there were puddles of water.i was just staring at him.seriously i hope the pickpocket shares my 1000baht with tt snake guy.i wldn't mind.anyhowss nxt time i'll prolly hide my money in my socks.

so it's back to singapore,aft all that rushing here and there.the pickpocket incident dampened my 'shop till i'm broke' mood.cos afterall,i was already broke.ah wellss.and the 'girls' are so so skinny.i was like erms,i can't imagine what they looked like before 'it'.and some had model like heights and figures.really makes uuu wonder what their original look was aye.ooo.and i saw this grp of break dancers practising their moves just outside the station.it was funky!bangkok's a great place.minus the pollution,the jams,the pickpockets - i say they'll surpass us as a shopping hub real soon.

this time it's going to be different!yeayss.

2006-05-24T21:15:00.000-07:00

the adventures of the unemployed!hahas.wells it was funn.suddenly it seems like i've got super a lot of time.
i went running on monday.due to the lack of distance ard my area,i was running up and down the 'park'.wellss.there was no lush greenery to boast of,no strong breeze to speak of,just me,the concrete path and many cars zooming across the expressway.i passed by 2army guys 4 times.hahas.it was quite amusing.aft the 2nd time we decided to give a quick wave when we passed each other.tsk.jurong cld do with a revamp,anytime!hahas.went to make use of dad's voucher.say hello to my new phone.hahas.it looks pretty thou it's quite big,but heys it's slim.
tue was spent swimming with hannyss.oh yeayss.i finally got to see marco's studio.it's how cool la.the idea of having a sound mixer,mics and the funky keyboard is just fantastical.hanny's friend came too and we recorded two songs!funky.hearing what you've played is just so queer!
went to recce east coast park ytd.goodness nxt time,shermin and i cannot meet.hahas.we just cannot meet.we always get lost!streetdirectory.com cheated my feelings.hahas.so much for telling us to alight opp blk 57 and walk towards ecp which is approx 600m away.tian ah!hahas.we walked till we had to call for help.tsk!ecp is super big.oh yes.and we must learn how to cycle.hahas.before june17!we must.it was funn.i think i'm darker already.hahas
and finally,i've clicked on the 'confirm' button for nus.say hi to ur new noose biz mate!wellss.i've found 3 ppl gg noose thus far.as opposed to the countless enthu biz ppl.ah wellss.it sounds exciting alr.rightt.
aloha to bangkok!i'm zooming there in abt yes,24hrs.hahas.how cool is tt.
i'm starting to see and experience more.and whoos,i love it.hahas.

2006-05-20T09:00:00.000-07:00

19th may was my last day at ica,level 5,counter 10.hahas.as rekss wld put it.it has been four long months of dragging myself out of bed at 6.50am every morning,of the long and dreadful 31mins mrt ride to lavender,of the 300 over passports tt rekss and i stamp and write on,of nice happy customers,of big grp lunches,of heart to hearts with soksiess,of updating forms when it's nearing 5pm.it's been a great experience.work's not all tt fun,save for the money tt gets deposited into ur account at the beginning of each month.work saps the energy out of you.work makes uuu a lil' grumpy and cranky sometimes.work makes you really treasure the much needed break during the weekends.i've learnt much abt people.sometimes uuu nv know what the person's real intention is.sometimes it's genuine,sometimes it comes with a condition,an obligation.anyhowss it was interesting and i really thank God for providing me with this job.i thank Him for shining His favour upon me,blessing me and placing me in such a favourable environment.

so yes yes,there was the usual hoo-ha on the last day.hahas.the aunties chipped in to buy me stuff.and 'padinoondroh' brought me out at 1130 to get my gifts!so sweet of them.i got myself a pretty butterfly clasp bag and a rather nice top tt 'padinoondroh' got for herself also!hahas.and on top of the shared gifts,each of the aunties gave me a gift tooss.so so nice.oh yeayss!i got a hong bao tooss.hahas.the wonderful lunchy,morning gang ordered pizza!but ya,it wasn't enough to go ard.hahas.ah wellss.it's the company tt matters.we were a bit high and noisy.hahas.there's this officer who got slightly irritated,and slapped the lunch sign on her table and walked off briskly.hahas.phew.she didn't march up to us and give us a lecture on office ethics.oh ya.i received 2 furry rambutans,tt came with a free ant.eekss!hahas.i'm appalled.terribly appalled.
anyhowss soksiess!i read ur letter in ur blog!thankiess!i feel da love.hahas.nowss uuu enjoy work kays.i'll be back sometime soon to bring greetings frm the lovely land of smiles - thailand!

seekers' serv tonight!man the bands were loud.hahas.i hope some were touched tonight.

i came across sth tt made me really happy.tt made me want to meet her right now!ya but it's past 12 alreadyy.tsk.hahas.

yes yes.the talk goes on abt enthu and nooose.it goes on and on and on and on.thankiess sista for checking up so many stuff for me.hahas.yes yes.i wonder who's the one gg into biz too!hahas.i've come to realise tt i'm just as insecure as a man as two eyes.tt goes to say tt i'm really insecure.time and again i've told myself tt nooose is the way man.ve been getting confirmation frm ppl along the way.but suddenly i'm swayed cos i realise so many of the ppl i know are gg ntu.and erms who's gg nooose mans?see no one raises their hands!sigh.this shall not hold me back any longer.i'm a noose girl man.erms.wells,i will confirm tt again another time.

2006-05-12T20:29:00.000-07:00

may has 2 short weeks and i like it.hahas.why can't we work 4 days a week only!it's just oh so blissful.
met up with some of them on thurs.hahas.so much for going to jec to relive the good old days.they've revamped je a little.they've got some traditional food stalls,and a few carts selling 'some think it's funky,others just walk away' stuff.and so we talked!hahas.xinlingss and her company!yeayss.i'm the PR manager.but somehow i got demoted during the course of dinner.hahas.arcade's funn.8 of us played datona and we were all gan jiong spiders,trying to pass the tapcard to the last person within tt 30seconds.hmms.but the card got lost mysteriously.we confronted the grp who took over our place.but frm the looks of it,the 4 of them can easily outdo all 8 of us,erms,yes,the commando in the grp wasn't exactly tt useful.hahas.so we bought another card.wootss.and we played more.hahas.
i went shopping with ahpigss ytd and wootss,it was funn!both of us were clearly tired and i realise talking rubbish is actually really funny.half the time i don't know what i was laughing about,don't know what our conversation was about.hahas.and about not having hips until you wear a belt.hahas.ehh.it doesn't sound tt funny now tt i'm typing it.hahas.ah wellss.i guess we both learnt a lot during our work stint.she in her hr management thingy and all.people are really interesting creatures tt breathe,eat,sleep,shop,scream and yell.
i feel like i've grown quite a bit since the beginning of this yr.i used to hate being misunderstood by people.used to try and clarify misunderstandings and everything.suddenly i'm just too tired to actually do tt.suddenly it doesn't matter to me whether i'm misunderstood and i find no need to explain at all.i used to hate being maligned.i can't say i love being maligned now.but it'll pass.when the odds are against youu,youu'll see the point.yeayss.and really if everyone thinks tt way of you just cos of a misunderstanding,nth youu can say or do tt'll erase their misconception abt you.
yes yes the talk abt enthu and nooose and smooo.hahas.wellss,i still haven't made a decision yet.enthu has always been my choice but recently nooose sounds just as attractive.ah wellss.before i leave,i'll send in my letters and make a decision.
hahas.there's this girl who withdrew the wrong amt of money frm her atm.it's so funny.she exclaimed loudly for all to hear.

2006-05-06T00:01:00.000-07:00

i walked past a photoshop today.realise i haven't developed any photos in ages!so i ransacked the comp for beautiful pictures that can be sent to the shop.whooss.and i realise it's been a long time since i've taken photos.i was looking thru prom photos and i realise i don't have a lot of photos!ahhs.it's the case of the 'i'll send to you!' problem.apparently they forgot to send it to me.booss!oh yes.many many photos are missing cos of this.eekss.

gradually i'm beginning to like being alone.i realise it's tiring being ard people all the time.but then again it depends.

i'm looking forward to 9 working days later.then hannyss and i can set out to go to exciting places,visit ade at the 100%mambo shop,irritate mingyss with many calls to pokka,and enjoy xunn's fantastic coupon!

oh yes yes.i went to visit ade at the shop.i was the only customer there and it felt weird cos i wasn't exactly looking at clothes,erms,rather,i was looking for ade.heyss it isn't easy trying to act like u're browsing thru the rack,and try and spot ade at the same time.especially when the racks are facing the wall,so uuu can't really see anything other than the clothes,and more clothes,and some more clothes.yeayss.finally i heard her.eekss.then i cldn't talk much to her cos the 2 perm staff there were a bit hostile looking.

the last time i went to the market was when i was a kid.eew.i hated the fish smell,the wet floor,and the pool of aunties trying to squeeze into all walkable lanes.i still don't like the market very much.but i realise it's actually funn looking at the uncle cut open the fish,remove its intestines,looking at another uncle cutting up the meat and looking at aunties hawkering their veggies.eekss.but it wasn't long before i was pushed by a sweaty aunty.

i guess some ppl appear in ur life as guest stars only.they appear for a while,before disappearing and nv to return for another episdoe again.

heard tt there's a flea market happening at chinatown today!it sounds exciting.

2006-04-29T07:24:00.000-07:00

whooperss!i'm sick.hahas.this dreadful mix of a sore throat,inflamed tonsiles,fever and flu.eew.it's not funn being sick.i realise that when uuu cough too hard,ur nostrils actually flare out a lil'.think it's a case of too high a pressure or sth.hmms.i didn't claim to be good in physics.hahas.anyhowss.two days spent at home can be quite boring.i slept,slept,and i slept.ohss at least i did sth funn todayss.hahas.i watched a walk to remember.oh yes i watched it again and again.i love the show.thou it didn't make me cry it just stirs in me this great big wave of emotions.i pitied jamie when she was being ostracised by the popular few in school.esp when they made the horrid poster of her.i yeayed with as much voice as i could manage when lendon finally stood up for her.oh yes.i can nv get the name of the male lead.is it lennon or lendon or brandon.ah wells.i yeayed even more when they were together.i shall watch it again!

i've come to a decision.may 19th!hahas.my last day of work.hmms.tt means i won't be feeling rich for too long.gaaa.

i played the piano todayss!hooray.i played some unpronouncable piece.it's such a waste to stop ayess.maybe i shld visit aunty sharon some day and start taking lessons from her again!she's such a fantastic teacher.she was the one who pushed me on to grade 8 even when i myself didn't believe i cld do tt big a jump.ah wells.we'll see.

sometimes i rely far too much on my own strength.thinking tt i can convince,thinking tt i can persuade using my own human knowledge.gaaa.i'm wrong.

2006-04-23T08:04:00.000-07:00

hmms.is it just me or is there this sudden wave of 'it's been long since we met up!' type of conversations zooming ard.ya.tt reminds me.it has been so long since i met up with so many ppl.not tt i lead a super uber happening and funky life and to meet up with me uuu have to book appointments and all.ahhs.i guess in my case u'll have to book appointments tooss.but not with me.rather,with my fantastical mummee and dadeeee.ah wellss.after a while,u'll get used to it and u'll be contented with meeting me once in a yr or sth.kays.i'm exaggerating alreadyy.

i miss my 5 babes of njcsb.kays.i miss the 4 of them.i'm the other babe if uuu haven't already inferred.yeayss.hahas.i know uuu all refuse to acknowledge this funky oh rama title i've decided upon.aiyah.but it's easier to say uuu know,rather than name so many names.let's save our tongues frm wear and tear!erms.hahas.guess we're all doing fine.each holding full time jobs,erms,save for two of our lovelies who are unemployed.hahas.go look for jobs babess!but slack ard at home first.let's set a date to meet.and i promise i'll go confront my two managers myself.hahas.we die die must meet at least twice before dear hannyss depart.sounds so serious.hahas.anyhowss.here's assuring the babess tt chief babe here lovess youu a lot a lot.so live each day knowing tt u're loved terribly!muackss!hahas.

i miss the bandeess.the whole grp of them.half of our population's now devoting their time to the small green island.but heyss.it's still funky manss.alumni's a way to meet.the relive the good old days type of event.hahas.

i miss my 07 gang of 5.yeayss.we finally met up on fri.went to this mysterious cafe tt s1 discovered.fantastical.hahas.i love the free flow of peanuts manss.talking as a grp is so so different.think we made super a lot of noise.but aiyahs.i felt so high!anywayss it was too dark for those ppl in there to recognise us.hahas.so tt's good.i hope everyone's happy with their jobs.i know s1 definitely is.hahas.and may huanss pass sats with flying and zooming colours.

i miss my batch ppl.miss seeing everyone together.not contented with seeing one or two at a time.hahas.must see everyone!we talked quite a bit todayss aft serv.ahhhs.i miss them so!it's my prayer tt they'll all journey thru life the way God wants them to.

i miss so many many people.i hope so many many people misses me tooss.hahas.if not so paiseh.hahas.

listen and u'll hear!

2006-04-12T06:14:00.000-07:00

roar.sometimes i think i can't get away with escaping.it'll always remain there.it'll always irritate me.it'll always turn me off.yuckss.i don't like it at all.but for now,escaping sounds good still.

was watching some 'never say die' show on 8.i wonder whyy those contestants put themselves to this.i think it's rather humiliating.i question how sincere those judges are in passing comments.wonder if they're sniggering as they say 'good.i love your fighting spirit.i don't get it.

mum said something tt was really true.but i don't like listening to it.maybe i shld think abt it.

gaaaa.i haven't been so filled with rage since i don't know when.it's not rage too.it's just this great immense feeling of irritation.gaaa.

there are so many types of ppl.there are so many sides to a person.but there is just so much we know abt them.

runn away from it all!

but despite all these unhappy irritating highly annoying incidents,i really thank God for shedding tt bit of light.the day before i was praying with a babe friend for ppl.and whooss.i was so happy.cos sth happened and tt was like an immediate answer to our prayer!i was so happy.all along it happened in this way,and suddenly it changed.whooss.

oh yes.i should pray.don't be lazy!

2006-03-30T07:36:00.000-08:00

left behind really scares me.it got me hooked and somehow made me want to read relevation to know more abt it.oh yes yes i realised revelation's revelation,and not revelations.because there's only one revelation at the end of the whole day.whooperss.interesting.it makes me think abt my own walk.i guess i haven't been thinking a lot the past few yrs aye.ah wellss.

i realise i miss being a bandee.i miss being worried abt lousy reeds,worried abt horrible running notes,super long holding notes,super soft notes and the likes.i miss my oh so funky bassoon.i miss the funn laughter peace and joy tt i shared with my fantastical bandeess.i so miss leading a bandee's life.

supernanny's really funny.i love listening to brits talk.somehow my try-to-act-like-a-brit accent doesn't come close to theirs.i love the way they say 'better','shudder','appalling','disgusting',and yes yes 'bloody'.i think it's just so amusing.they've got this high and low pitch thing for every two syallabic word.nice!hahas.i shld try it too.

oh those high tech hole punchers and paper cutters they have in the office are amusing.i feel super pro whenever i use it.stamping's funn.ayess.working with another living creature is always more funn.yeayss.

sing at the top of ur voice!

2006-03-22T07:43:00.000-08:00

i need to rant.
what on earth is wrong with it.what's wrong with going there.it's how harmless.stop worrying unnecessarily.great i'm old and ageging.but i nv seem to be more than 7yrs old ayee.stop asking me weird qns.stop telling me worse case scenarios,comparing with other people and all.it's irritating.i don't like it.don't say that youu aren't nagging.baaa.it's how obvious.
rright.i'm done.

i wish you all wldn't care so much.it's insane.

2006-03-20T06:08:00.000-08:00

i hardly know where to start.eekss.youu know there's always this pt in ur life where youu feel like u're going nowhere except down,then someone asks uuu a really simple qn that suddenly reverts everything back up for youu.rightss.so what if uuu don't.all the talk abt it these few days.and i feel truly blessed.
it's such a torture.such such a torture.yet sometimes it gets really normal.ughss.i see the marks.i really need to roar.ah wellss.ah ah wells!
i still don't agree much with some stuff we talked abt todayss.there's always room for discussion!there's always so many ways to do one thing.but in the end aren't we all trying to reach the same goal.so do those small eeny bitsy details really matter.like who cares if the an olympics marathon winner wears puma or nike manss.tt person won la.we really shldn't be bogged down by details.
dryy.like the desert miss the rain!the talk of revival.talk to fresh water.but i guess the heart's not there yett.
i'm feeling grumpy.and it doesn't help tt my connection is so so bad today.
work saps ur energy.it leaves youu dry and withered like a dried plum.eekss.

2006-03-05T07:30:00.000-08:00

whooperss.it's been long.A results came and shocked us all.oh how i missed mrs lim's killer stare.oh how i missed her ultimate gossipy side.ah wells.results are so so irritating.tt few measly alphabets trying to instill fear,dread,joy,suspense and what have youuss.i thank God for seeing me thru the past few months.all the eeky mugging sessions,tatas!complacency and mediocracy.all the talk abt which uni which courses are rather dreadful.ughss.i need to hear Youu!so many are gg overseas.what's wrong with spore manss.spore's cool la.where else can youu find ur beloved laksa and satayss and durianss.

ahh estherss.lying is wrong.but it's really hard to tell the truth to dee and meee.

had a fantastical talk with hannyss not too long ago.thou there are some things which i disagree,i guess it more or less made me more sure in what i believe in.i guess there's nth so much as to a right and wrong answer.we can argue all we want but ultimately it really doesn't matter lahss.so beauutiful.i wonder if God looks down on us and laughs at the foolish and funny antics we put up every now and then.

yi ma's doing great!praise God.she was complaining the other day abt how the nurses were so rough.hahas.thou she's without a stomach she's still so so strong.she's still bubbling with joyy.there's so much to learn frm her.

have a fantastical week estherss and every babe and dude.i want my wkends to come.noww.

2006-02-24T07:11:00.000-08:00

days zoom past.zoom zoom.it's the end of yet another boring,lifeless,work-filled week.i drag myself out of bed every monring,looking forward only to lunch,and 5pm,tt's when i knock off.i can't imagine working for ten over yrs,getting long service awards and stuff.eekss.u're doing the same thing everyday for 10 years of your life.tuas is nv going to materialise.i've no complains abt lavender.just that everything is starting to seem rather depressing.like todayy.lunch became such a depressing event.we ran out of places to go to.went to almost every place tt offers food.the pathetic coffeeshops,the romantic umbrella market,beach road.checking files makes me depressed.

sunflower seeds are nice to munch.

sometimes it pushes me to the brink of an ugly outburst.sometimes i go thru in my mind what i'll say,what will happen.it's hard to control.it's hard to place my finger on what exactly is just so irritating.

yi ma's op went well and i thank God for seeing her thru the op.although there were some disappointments here and there i guess it sets our hearts at ease knowing tt the risk is now zero,tt it'll nv occur again.despite all these she's still got so much joy in her.be encouraged all youu healthy movable people.

our minds are so fascinating.

2006-02-15T05:53:00.000-08:00

most people think they've seen me somewhere before.be it in their school,in some weird sounding camp,or somewhere along the streets.hahas.i have a common face!eekss.tt means i have no striking features.ah wells.having a common face is funkyy kays.no one shall disagree.

anyhowss work's still just abt the same.i'm pressing the same few keys,walking down the same stretch of carpeted floor,using the same few muscles.

i met this small little boy on the mrt one morning.he wasn't standing and smiling like most kids his age.he wasn't even acting grouchy because mama woke him up early or sth.he was in a pram,with a tube to his mouth.he was making gurgling sounds at the back of his throat.he was staring at my direction and so i was trying all ways and means to make him smile.but he didn't smile.not even when i flashed my super funky peace sign at him.i started talking to his maid.he's only two la.but i bet he's gone thru so much more than i did.everytime he makes those gurgling sounds i felt really terrible.he doesn't smile.i pray tt he'll be healed of whatever he is gg through.i pray tt he gets to enjoy his childhood,just like each and every one of us did.

perspectives.i realise situations change when youu see it differently.your reaction changes also when things appear different to youu.youu become different.

some things are scaryy.i wonder whyy.

focus on things above,and not on things below

2006-02-06T05:19:00.000-08:00

my oh so funky section.where art thou jo-stherss!

ohss ma pretty babes.hahas.as usual we were late la.i love knowing tt i might be late.love the excitment of rushing and trying to beat time.funn.reunion dinner's always funn.hahas.whooperss jo-stherss and ah hengss!it was a pretty place.thou the aunty spilled some tang yuan syrup,water and soya sauce on my jeans.i oh so love band.the people,the fantastical music we make,the unsaid ties.

eekss tuas.i feel like i'm on survival.the room reminds me of the comp lab mr tham used to bring us to for maths tutorials.the unwashed brocolli.i like being paid to talk.hahas.

yeayss.i got my first pay!i'm gg to shoooppp!

one day He will turn your scars into stars.

2006-01-24T06:20:00.000-08:00

ughss!my connection is so so bad lahss.i got d/c-ed more than 5 times within 10mins.it's so irritating.ah wellss.
work is quite funn.hahas.it wasn't tt scary cos there was this grp of temp staff.so wells,basically had some company.so qiao this ex rv girl was working there too.yeayss.hahas.say bye to being bored and alone and sad.hahas.anyhowss.we got splitted up and dispatched to different sections.eekss.i was the only one in tt section.but it was quite funn.i felt quite pro typing.hahas.the novelty wore off after a while.customer service's rather enjoyable.prolly cos i don't get scolded by the customers cos they are the ones asking questions rather than me being questioned.eekss.i ate lunch alone ytd.i almost disintegrated and evaporated.ahhs.kept trying to act busy msg-ing.ah mingss helped me to act cool.hahas.at least i met small boy towards the end so it wasn't tt bad lahss.yeayss.xinjian came to work todayss!feel less alone.hahas.i wonder what we're gg to do aft cny.i suspect we are all supposed to act like tourists so tt they can prepare for all situations in future.funky monkey.
whooperss.working's funn.hahas.

2006-01-12T06:33:00.000-08:00

hahas.i just burst out laughing when sok sent me this.hahas.ahhs.it's so funny.and what were we doing?

i almost miss sch.hahas.at least i get to see everyone.now with so many of them working and in the botaks camp i hardly get to see them.

yeayss.bangkok here i come.will make it a point to sweep the shops clean.hohoho.

i thank God for His providence.for the job,for this trip.yeayss.

happy birthday crystalss!happy 19th!

be a jolly beeann.the world's an ok place to be in.

2006-01-05T00:26:00.000-08:00

band withdrawal symptoms/army/eekss/ppl are seriously interesting creatures/funny/such an awkward situation/job gala hunting/purple hair/ash coloured hair/wonderful hairstylists/honest conversations are gd for health/i feel farr away from God/i don't want to be sucked into the world/i love my bestiess/i love my dee and meee but not their weird tantrums/i love my bandeess/i love my gang of 5 in 07 thou it's been really long/ah wellss/grow up estherss/

bye bye erwinss!we'll miss youuu.

2005-12-28T00:50:00.000-08:00

whooperss.guangzhou and hongkong were both great.i thank God for his protection that was with us during this past wk.
loved the cold.
loved the cheap pumas-s.
loved wendy who came to watch the concert.
loved the thrill of getting stuck in the stairway.
loved chiong-ing here and there.
loved the freedom we had.
loved the fantastical mango dessert we had.
loved jumbo the high class floating restaurant.
loved disneyland.
loved my room mate thou she sometimes falls aslp before i finish talking.
loved my roomie for always waking me up.
loved the late nights.
loved the pia-ing of delicacies.
loved the company.
loved the harbour near our hotel.
loved christmas eve night.so full of activity.
loved the road blocks.
loved the countless cute babies esp the tang yuan boy.
loved the funkily dressed dog and its pretty owner.
loved talking by the harbour.

i'm such a careless freak.can't believe i gave tt icky taxi driver a 500 note instead of a 50.i sure hope he has a family with young kids or with parents to look after.so my 'donation' of 500 will not be gone to waste.i hope with my 500 his kids will be able to get new clothes and new pencils for sch.i hope i hope i hope so.i thank ade crystal hannyss and mingyss for what they did.it meant a lot.

everyone smokes over there.it's quite gross.visiting disneyland makes me want to work in a theme park.then i'll be happy everyday.all the activity,all the smiles,all the cutesy characters tt do not frown.classic.shopping wasn't as exceptional.didn't really grab a lot of things.i'm scared of bargaining.some of them are so fierce and they snap at uuu in canton.

the trip was a whirl of events tt i can hardly remember in detail.didn't get to do some things tt i hoped to do.

a wk passed.a mere 7 days.but loads of things happened.a wrap up to the 2yrs we all shared.an uncompleted ending.yucks.how i wished.

hahas.i realised the trip wasn't so much for the performances.hahas.weird.

2005-12-07T06:48:00.000-08:00

i thank God for all the wonderful ppl in my life.
yeayss.thank youu so much for the lousy surprise.hahas.i really thought i was gg to get kidnapped or sth laaa.but it was really nice.hahas.yeayss.i got half of my birthday wish.thank youuuss!
yeayss.i'm legal.i'm a yr older.but i still feel the same.i still like kiddo stuff.yeayss.and i think giodarno understands the joy of turning a yr older.because they decided to give me a discount.whooss.ppl shldn't stop celebrating their birthdays as they get older.i hate to see the childlike joy of opening presents,cutting the cake,and blowing out candles all gone as we age.
i'm a happy,joyous 18 yr old!

band has been such a huge part of my life.i wonder what it'll be like if i stopped playing altogether.

2005-12-03T02:00:00.000-08:00

i'm not good at many things.but i'm really good at escaping.
frm situations i don't like
frm ppl i don't want to face
frm things i don't want to face up to
frm reality

yupperss.prom's over.
so much food was wasted.
only ate like the first 3 dishes.
council's skit was a bit out of pt.
ah wells.loads of photo taking.
yeayyss.my table won best dressed.
hahas.we suspect it was cos all our colours clashed like crazy.so the prize was like a reward for our very badly colour co-ordinated prom attire.some sort of a consolation.
i'll miss wendyy and huan.huan's flying today.wendy's flying back on mon.i hope i get to see wendy in hk.
doubt it'll be like before.but at least we know everyone's still alive and kicking enthusiastically.
the hotel stayover was funn.hahas.charades.xiaomingss's videos are so precious.hahas.i'll laugh at it again.can we playy it again.again and again.

i don't want to just hold on to memories.
i'll remember them.but it isn't enough for me.

2005-11-29T06:19:00.000-08:00

seriously

i wonder if insurance agents have any friends

2005-11-23T06:26:00.000-08:00

so it's over and done with

thank God for seeing me thru

coincidence

my aunty

maid

granpa

i want to see a miracle

and i believe

felt slightly cheated

scared

the excitement

the anticipation

died

hope 'its' ok

i really see no harm in it

whoopee

prom's coming

right

know it sounds dumb

but i wished it was nv over

2005-11-01T00:21:00.000-08:00

yeayss.finally i get to go online.aft staring at the comp day aft day aft day.i must swith to cable.or else i'll get comp withdrawal symptoms.not good either.whooss.
lots of things have happened since the day i last touched the comp.ah wells.
yeays.we went to the tailor's ytd.it was funn.i like the tailor!!whooss.yes largely owing to the fact that she said i looked demure.hahas.
mugg mugg mugg.i can't wait to cruise freedom road.

2005-10-05T06:06:00.000-07:00

2005-09-25T20:44:00.000-07:00

father smacks boy in his chest cos boy bullied son

hahas.

hilarious.

can't imagine anyone doing tt

school bullies i'm sure we all had our fair share of tt

whether we were the ones being bullied

or the bullies themselves

i got bullied last time

by this guy in my sch bus

he used to pull girls' hair

snatch our small square erasers

and pinch our arms

ughss

he stopped taking the sch bus aft two yrs

and so i didn't get bullied anymore

yeayss

i was a naughty girl

but i think i didn't bully ppl la

wellss

or maybe i did

i used to be tall

and i sat right at the back of the class

there used to be this girl in our class

who was different

we erms did sth bad

we twisted stapler bullets

placed them on her chair

we were expecting her to scream and yelp when she sat down

erms.she didn't react at all

kays

so i was naughty

bullies are quite harmless la.and most of the time it happens in pri schs.when we were all young and oblivious to consequences.ah wells.

kbox gowns piercings town.yeayss.they're coming over today.and then we're having dinner at the nice coffeeshop at my place.so funn.

just knew of sth sad.it spoilt my day.and to think tt i have to face it again tmr.

cell ytd was great.a lot of application points.for me,it was terribly challenging.i find it very hard to love sincerely,those ppl that i don't like.since i don't like them,i see no reason in me being so nice to them,treating them the same way i treat ppl tt i like and can stand.haven't come across many tt i can't stand,so i guess it's been ok.but ytd's pt struck me.it made me redirect the perspective frm which i behaved.ughss.it's so hard.but i'll try.it's so unbelievable.how God can die for us thou each of us are so broken in our own ways.

2005-09-15T20:38:00.000-07:00

one more wk to go!

maths was terrible.

how on earth do youu do qn 1?

and the many other qns behind.

econs is terrible

estherss!!what were youu thinking of!

i wasted so so so much time

physics

i guess i'm a hot candidate for 0 percentile

hist2 was better than the previous few subjs

but i still cldn't finish the last qn!

baa.i must write faster!

i must think faster!

cannot be tt blur confused toot i am

prelims are terrible

whyy do we put ourselves thru it

cos we have to.

eeks youu prelimss!

i don't like youuu

went for lunch with ah pigss aft hist ytd

the feeling of gg to town

whooss just excites me

i wanted to buy sth on compulsion

sadly there wasn't anything there to buy

i still like my value shop

cldn't get to slp last night

was trying to design my room

browsed thru the ikea catalogue

whooss.goodness!

can't wait to refurnish my rm

whoever came up with the word 'mugging'

actually it's quite dumb if we keep saying we're mugging

gives me the impression tt we're all holding mugss

and clanging them away

acks.prelims has taken away my sense of humour

i shall come up with a new word to replace it

ermss.maybe not.

yeayss.can't wait to watch king david musical

it's gg to be so so good

sunday's show's fully booked alr

all the hard work

all the countless rehearsals

whooss.

all boils down to the show itself

i hope God'll be happy when He watches it

whyy did God make little girls

because He needed laughter to fill this world

yes yes.i need to get back to hist.

why do all the russian leaders have terribly hard to spell names!!

whooss!jiayouss ppl.one more wk.

shopping slacking stoning awaits us

whooss.do youu feel motivated alr?

hahas.

laugh.

2005-09-06T20:37:00.000-07:00

ah kong's gg for op today

Lord i pray that You'll take charge of the op

yongxiang's dad has dengue

i pray that You'll heal him

it's so scary how a person can just fall

and crumble

and be so helpless

at the feet of diseases,disasters,old age

but there's nth to fear rite

it's so sad to see the grp becoming so small

suddenly everyone has just so many other things gg on

suddenly no one has the time to come anymore

suddenly everything else is far more impt than the very reason we're living

suddenly

and i don't like sudden changes

i can't adapt to them

and suddenly is not gg to make me any happier

eekss youu

can't youu find someone else

i'm tired of it

i love being at home alone

waking up late

eating whatever i want for breakfast

lazing ard

staring into nth

i love not doing anything

solitude

it's quite a nice feeling

to be quiet and still

being happy in the midst of all the turmoil in ur small lil' mind

ah mingss is rite

hahas

i rather get kicked out than to make a decision

no one likes to be the [bad guy] urhss

i can't wait to laugh

can't wait to eat and not grow fat

can't wait to watch every single movie cinemas have to offer

can't wait can't wait can't wait

can't wait to go on saturdays

to enjoy the close fellowship

ahhss.till then

i wonder if our class brought joy to any teacher's life

i really hope we did

i mean where else can youu find such an exciting class

07 such a nice number

complete with 28 nice ppl

yeayss.me included.whooss

for now

i shall resign to my muggertoot life

i'm determined to lead a happening muggertoot life

i shall use the coolest 60cent pens

i shall use the coolest winnie the pooh pencil

i shall make mugging as exciting as possible

God loves me

He loves youu tooss

2005-08-30T03:17:00.000-07:00

i'll miss our haunts.

i'll miss the clean,dry and cosy toilet.

i'll miss slacking in lt1 aft econss lect.

i'll miss acting silly.

i'll miss all our free periods,all our extended lunches.

i'll miss ponning.

i'll miss the beauutiful tree outside our classroom.

i'll miss the stairway.

i'll miss lunch talks.

i'll miss the corridor.

i'll miss youu two.

we were super high today.whyss.cos we prolly won't be doing what we're doing anymore.no more lunches during free periods.no more slacking in the lts during our free periods.ouch.i feel sad.

why does it seem weird.guess i was right.

the good old days.

move on.

some flowers blossomed,others withered.

i'm contented.

2005-08-20T07:02:00.000-07:00

and so another wk has passed me by.i came here to rant abt it.
i ran here and there and everywhere.kays.it's just frm jurong to panjang every alternate days.i think my grandpa's quite happy there.but it's so obvious he's not speaking the truth cos the nurse tells us tt he sobs at night.he says staying there's quite ok,but whenever my grandma comes to visit him,he'll tell her how lonely he feels here and how much he wants to go back home.ouch says my heart.but all i can do is feel sad for him.but yeayss.he accepted Christ on thursday!yeayss.the pastor was really good and i thought he really connected with grandpa on a certain lvl.
another guy in the home has a tumour in his brain.he's only 39.ouch.it's different when u hear of these patients and when u actually see them in person.ouch.it's so so different.and i really thank God for giving us good health.i mean we may complain how fats congregate in our tummys or on our thighs,but seriously,isn't it just so amazing to be breathing?i appreciate life a lot more aft frequent visits to the home.i appreciate my grandmother a lot more tooss.i feel bad for sometimes rushing her to end her phone calls cos i need to finish up my work.eeks youu esther.tt's so horrible.
i read the newspaper today.i saw the pictures of starving african kids.i plead guilty to the numerous times i throw away food,cos i can't finish what's on my plate,or cos there's so much food we forgot what has expired.baa baa.corrupt profiteering disrupts aid sent to these places.eekss.humans are how selfish.
colours was okss i guess.it looked like a fashion parade.my tianss arh.hahas.ah wells.regretted not koping the light sticks.so mei mei.food was good.whooss.the chicken was so hard to bite.baa baa.we went hanny's house to rot.so funn.pictionary was funn.slip disc,osteoporosis.hahas.cinnamon was nice.surveyss take up our time.
it's so weird.how suddenly a common grd's gone.suddenly we seem to go back to square one sometimes.it's like snake and ladder.i guessed i just slided down a green slimy snake.eekss.oh wells.i just need to roll the dice again?yeayss.how i wish it was this simple.
blending into the world.hmms.tricky.
i shall watch uuu drive me crazy laterss to make myself happy.i need to feel happy everyday.yeayss.i know whyy tt mp3 player's free alr.cos it stores only 14songs.hahas.ayess.free stuff are good anyhowwss.
all things bright and beauutiful.all creatures great and small.

2005-08-12T06:40:00.000-07:00

ahhss.so blissful to be slacking ard.i don't know why but there's this horrendous inertia in me to not start doing anything.so nice to see seconds tick away.erms.kays.not really.
ah wells.i'm in this i really don't mind being alone mode nowadays.but i'm still not really up to it yet.hahas.
i met yiqi todayss!she cut her hair short too.and we were talking abt how pathetic our scalps were.ahhs.the horror and fear of this icky bitsy thing called lack of hair.baaa.i figure tt i'm not a good keep in touch friend.i'm lazyy.really admire those ppl who over the yrs so faithfully send nice little notes to their friends,organise meet ups.
was watching the shoot show just now.ahs.whatever tt show's called.they were discussing abt teenagers gg for branded goods.waahh.their vocab's just wow manss.hermes,s&l,d&g,prada,dior and what have youss.and there was this guy with a 1600 LV bag.ahhhs.so not worth!!i'll nv buy it lahs.so what if it's branded.i think the design's not pretty.it just looks like a chess board,except tt it's brown.what's wrong with imitations?i'm perfectly comfortable with tt.it's much cheaper,and sometimes i think imitation designs are prettier.i love my fake gucci frm msia tt costs only 7bucks.hahas.and i'm proud of it cos it's orange and it lasts.ppl say buying branded goods are like an investment,cos they last very long and it's quality will always remain.ahhs.i beg to differ!!i can't stand using the same wallet for more than a yr or sth.my wallet screams to be changed every once in a while.using the same wallet is so boring!we all need some variety in our life.but ah wells,branded goods do reek of a certain social status thing.ahhs.materialism's eating us all.
i love watching tv.i need retail therapy soon.

2005-08-08T06:38:00.000-07:00

the past two wks were horrid ones.it's scary how fast ppl age.it's scary when uuu see the veins popping out on his forehead,and what's left of his gung-ho past are reduced to just loose skin and bones.his tatoo still remains,but it looks so wrong on him now.and so he came back frm the hospital.a hospital stay's supposed to make a person well rites.how come he turned out to be weaker than he was?why is it tt he can't walk now?i think it's in the mind.2wks on lying down on the bed,of being waited upon hand and foot,makes him dependent on nurses for everything.home searching.mummy's really stressed out.phone calls and what have yous.i wished i cld help.but then again this is sth not for me to poke my nose into.sibling quarrels.interesting.
sometimes the solution's just there.but it's the ppl involved,their opinions,their criticisms tt makes the whole situation worse than it is.tsk tsk.we shld sometimes just put aside all these la.hahas.but it's just oh so hard.
went to watch a voice recital ytd night.it was so beauutiful.God really blessed all these ppl with such beautiful voices.there was this nj girl too.didn't know tt.met ben at the concert.joanne and tessa sung so beautifully.the phantom duet was super good la!!the phantom was so funny.their voices were loud,but not defening.it was so rich and solid tt i can't even poke my finger thru.fantastic.
wells sometimes i think i exhibit double standards.it's so hard to be nice to ahems.baa.
food.whoos.it was a great experience.saw the home hannah's class was in charge of.i really applaud the helpers.honestly i'd be scared to be amongst them.ahhhs.i didn't get to see the little kids.oh mans.i think i want to be a kindergarten teacher aft As.hahas.so so so funn.
kboxing with 07 was super fun tooss.suzy and i wanted to crash hanny's but they went orchard instead.hahas.guess it's one of the few class outings we have.so so funn.it was really enjoyable.
ge tai is so funky.they have great sound systems.

2005-08-05T04:55:00.000-07:00

it's been a week.i hold all those emotions close to my heart.check out the photos.it basically wraps up everything.
see it at queenesther.shutterfly.com/ for vnite photos
for agm photos share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=8AbuGzZk5ZuXJA
go see it kays.it took me forever to upload it.hahas.
played the wonderful bassoon todayss.i missed it.just love playing in a band.the feeling's just so indescribable,and all too wonderful.wheess.
heyss s1.i hope u're well over it all.i know youu are.cos u're stronger than you think you are.
i shall be cleverer in future.i shall not pon pe and then get caught.baa.the guilt still haunts me.hahas.
wells.let's all resign to our muggertoot fates and be content with the company of our books and notes.raaah.i roared.

2005-07-29T05:32:00.000-07:00

saw pretty pictures displayed today.drawn by some ppl i know.they were so pretty.the pictures almost speak to youu.take a peek into their minds.interesting.

i like listening to old songs.think mariah carey was a fantastic singer.but ayess.whatever happened to her nice soulful songs.it's all those icky incomprehensible funky mama rap like songs now.i miss good songs sung by great singers.

it feels funny to be described as matrue and independent.hahas.i nv thought of myself as a mature and independent person.i can nv eat a meal alone.i'll prolly disintegrate into the seat before i start to eat.

i was doing QT ytd and the psg i read really touched me.it was on how often we take our blessings for granted.did a run thru of all the things God has blessed me with.and i realised that i've nv thanked Him for all these things.i don't have to wait for big things to happen for me to thank Him for what a wonderful and blessed life He's given me.

there's a hero.if you look inside your heart.you don't have to be afraid of who you are.

all the rojak activities are happening tmr.wells.don't feel the atmosphere yet.

somehow feel that the circle's shrinking.out of habit?

seeing things thru the eyes of a little girl makes the world a beauutiful place,free of all worries,free of all problems,and free of all complications.it's so nice to be living in a place where everyone's happy,where everyone laughs,where everyone has lame jokes to tell,where everyone isn't afraid to act ugly,where no one is being judged.it's nice.

2005-07-20T05:07:00.000-07:00

happy birthday mingyss!
hope youu have funn.the surprises,deliciously yummy cake,presents and the revelation frm me.wheess.

yeays.glad we sorted it out.felt super great just unleashing all those pent up emotions.manss.i felt bad tooss.guess it's thru all these stuff tt will make us all grow closer together ya.yeayss.

oh manss.it just feels so good.thanks anness!

2005-07-16T00:27:00.000-07:00

i just need to roar. i just need to throw a tantrum.

huh\that hurts\so tt's what youu all think of me\wellss i shld just go away ehs

raaahhhhhss

2005-07-15T06:31:00.000-07:00

oh wheess.felt super liberated today.felt super detached frm them for the past four days.all the afternoons and nights.me being at home and all.it felt esp weird ytd.i must have been like a baboon today.ahhs.i just can't help it.you know tt kind of i'm finally free feeling?it feels really good.tt rush of adrenaline,tt surge of emotional high.oh mans.so indescribable.
ayess.but still think i'll have to get use to it.oh boos.whyss me.i hope everything's over really soon.empathise with those who are caged tooss.

i'll miss them.

shall snip off my hair againss.baldness has come to haunt me yet again.ughss.how i hate it.days of a mugger bum bum are coming real fast.ahhs.let me pls enjoy first.

2005-07-06T20:10:00.000-07:00

etude xxx was smashing.

section lunch.chomp away at coro.enghong was listening to some IOC broadcast.funny.he cldn't hear us speak and when he spoke.hohoho.it was like thunder.we gave yongss his cow!it's so cute.he better like it.took loads of photos.boeyss is a horrible photographer.hahas.no one felt safe to entrust their cam to him.got scolded by some stranger cos we were blocking the pathway.bought water for the band.water is really quite cheap mans.54 bottles for only 18bucks.wahh.can youu imagine?you can buy 100bottles for only 35!hahas.quite a good deal.eeky annes bluffed an auntie that i was in the superstar contest.those carrying the bottles took a cab to sch.yeayss.had funn with the euphos.we are just oh so funky.

we were supposed to carry on with the tradition and yum-seng as a section,together with the basses.but guess there was just too many things to do?and with so many section mates gone at different times.

packed to move off to vch.guess tt's when all the gan jiong-ness sets in.kept checking and checking all the reeds,files and necessary medicine and all.felt like an ant being squashed by a big fat ugly thumb,and i was trying to squirm out of it.loaded the instruments.i felt so strong when i shifted the amp with wangzi.waited for bus.heavy coats,but i feel strong.think i made some of the coats smelly.hahas.i thank all the guys for helping shift the boxes of water.it's really heavy.hahas.erwinss tried to shift two boxes at one go.

whyss they split the lowerwinds.like 5ppl only la.still want to split.realised tt i was in the wrong rm.how paiseh!rehearsal was short.think ah ho doesn't want to tire us.my reed was still it's rebellious self.eeks it!!food came!yeays.angela's father is so nice.gave us free egg tarts too.yeays.band has strong and mighty girls.

changed.eat.chomp chomp.alumni prac.ahhs.the armenian dance part is so horrible.hahas.didn't manage to play tt part well during rehearsal.i love playing pirates.it's so nice.really love all the syncopated rhythms thou i haven't mastered it yets.hahas.playing tt song makes me really high.

and so the concert started.yeayss.the guys looked really smart in coats.and i think a lot of them love wearing coats cos some were even wearing it when they were shifting instruments back to sch aft concert.hahas.don't think i don't know!!thought orient sounded so much better than during college day.as i was playing,i watched mr ho.i watched his cirlces,his strokes,his expression,and heard him sing.realised how much i have grown in this band,and under his baton.and i'm reminded that this journey is nearing its end.guess tt's what really made me play and not bother if my reed was still being its rebellious self,and really feel for what the band was playing.and i thought every song was beauutiful.it's not all the technicalities delivered in a song tt matters,it's how touching and how much has it moved ppl in band and the audience tt really scores the touchdown.and i think we did just tt.sometimes we're just too caught up with ohs how's my tone,is this pitch correct,is my reed too hard till we forget tt we're supposed to feel as we play.tt's something i've learnt under ah ho.
there was this weird dialogue that was gg on during our concert.during yongss's solo for celts,there was this rest.and tt eeky 'oh yeah' was heard so distinctively!thought it was some person's hp at first,and tt person was trying to sabo our concert.hahas.over active imagination estherss!

percussion ensemble and stage band was cool.love chicago mans.alumni.yeays.a few glitches here and there.yeayss.i cld play armenian!!thou i still didn't come in together with the flutes,so i just didn't play tt part.wheess.yeays.and pirates.can i keep playing tt song over and over again?it's just so nice.jap graf was high.so love dixie.brought me back to the time when we were practising this song for syf in sec2.tribute to mr ho.the weird dialogue was back again.made some ppl's voice sound as if they sucked in large amounts of helium.super funny.presentation of gifts.hope they all love their flowers,and mr ho loves his poster,baton and mei mei sunflowers and lilies.

i admit i wasn't a fan of mr ho when i first entered njband.think cos i heard stuff frm seniors who spoke of his famous circles.cldn't figure out what he was conducting and saying initially.and i don't deny tt it was only aft syf tt i really come to really like and respect mr ho,and appreciate all that he has put in to njband.i really thank him for believing in each and everyone of us.him having the trust of what we are capable of,him having so much confidence in us thou sometimes we ourselves may not have tt much confidence in ourselves.it really makes a difference.because he believes in us,how can you bear to disappoint him?sometimes i hear him cough in the band store rm.once i caught him eating a banana in the store rm.hahas.and whenever he snorts i think it's how funny.yeays mr ho!!njband loves you so much.and we really thank you for you believing in us,for being our big grand-dad.

amazonia was whooo.hahas.relive the syf moment.
abba gold makes me so so so high.wanted to go hug them.hahas.but why are they seated so far frm me!

thank youu God.You've nv let me down.
daddy and mummy!!i'm a naughty girl.thanks for loving me so much.
s1!the pretty card.thanks for understanding my passion for band.
mingyss xunss clarine hannyss adee!xie xie.very gratefull for each and everyone of youu.all the scurrying ard here and there.all the frank comments,support and encouragment,and always so willing to help.i really appreciate it all.gg out of the way to help.just very grateful and thankful.
hengss anness!cloth.hahas.phobia of nail polish alr.thanks.all the help and just being there.
crystalss!you did well for ticketing.don't always stress urself unnecessarily.
library!!the reason we can play,because we all have our scores!yeays.thanks!
qmss!stage plan was beauutiful.we are so pro can.those movers were really good tooss.
edo!money man.ticketing was great.full house!!hahas.we are still not debt-free now thou.
junss!i read ur msg.i prayed.i know youu did too. :)
zhiss!whoopee conducting.nxt step dye ur hair to get tt eric person's beauutiful hair!
all the concert comms did beauutiful.video and presentation tooss.i'm sure mr ho teared.kays,maybe not in front of us.hahas.
and the audience.

i love my one and only njband.nth and no one can take away this wonderful journey we've been thru.

oh yes yes.happy birthday yongss.our section cannot do without youu!thanks!

2005-07-04T05:24:00.000-07:00

read zhiss blog just now and was listening to the cd they burnt for each and every band member.heyss!!it's really cool la.i'm sure everyone appreciates it a lot a lot.because i really do.
cts are over.hahas.i haven't enjoyed the end of cts yet!it felt so weird not to be gallavanting in orchard or some shopping centre right aft hist paper with s1 and huiqi.band is funn!oh wells.to the extent of me not knowing what day it is today.
attire's quite a problem.but i really thank God for minghui ade who went down to bugis to look for tt sinma shop for me,but only to find that there were only 2scarves in tt whole sinma shop.for sixun for gg to concourse to get the pretty,funky hats.for hanjie for coming over to my house on fri and pia-ing the poster thru the night.had a really long talk with her till 430am.hahas.but we overslept!so sorry shuhengss didn't go down to shift the coats as promised.hannyss and i cabbed down.thank clarine for waiting for slow pok me and for going down to causeway to check isrida out.without all their help,think has,i can go and laugh.
and of course hengss and anness!really.i'm really thankful for them.i know i can't manage this whole thing alone.pia-ing down to nie on fri night for the coats.and then we almost made hengss's dad pissed.not being able to feel our legs below those coats.hahas.think we all built loads of muslces just carrying those coats urh.hahas.kirbyss is nice tooss.he asked if help was needed.
the supplier was supposed to call us on sunday but she didn't!hengss went to check with the shop and they only had 30.my tians arh.like a day before full dress and we don't have scarves.hahas.i kept asking God why He didn't want to provide me with the scarves.didn't i pray?didn't i tell Him how badly i needed those scarves?i know what His reason was!we won't know how to manage tt huge piece of cloth.we went spotlight to get cloth.mass production started at night.felt really bad cos hengss had to give up her section dinner.but she cld go for it oness.annes had her old clique outing and she didn't go for it too.felt like i was robbing them of their funky and happening lifestyles.we tried all ways and means to make it match our attire.it was hard but i guess we did it!cutting cloth is so hard.i really appreciate all the tailors in the world now.intended to use nail polish to prevent fraying but half a bottle was used just for one sash.hahas.so funny.burnt the edges in the end.i thank God for my maid tooss!she is so efficient!she can cut!fast and straight lahs!so funky.
hannyss said we only have a few days left to serve the band,so let's just put in our all during these few days.i agree with it toos.4intensive days.and more to come.yes.i'm looking forward to it.and i don't want it to end.
my parents quarelled over it.i know they were trying to help,in their own ways.guess they both had different ways to get to the end product.quarelled with them too.sometimes i really think they're not making sense.how come he can make concessions to so many other ppl but not to me?i don't think i'm asking too much.how come when he has sth to do we all wld have to change to fit into his plan.ahhhhs.
heard stuff that we predicted wld happen.i guess predicting it really helps.at least it lessens the whole impact.i really prefer ppl to tell it to my face.seriously,i won't be pissed.somehow when i heard it today i still cannot bring myself to bring up the topic.yes we predicted it wld happen but i just can't tear this wall down.it's just me.
hope everything turns out ok.there are a lot things that may seem small to ppl.but ppl can't do without it.
i like abba gold.it reminds me of the mama mia musical i watched.
don't want the whole journey to end.really enjoyed all that has happened.yes.even the heart stopping no scarves incident.
i miss what happened a yr ago during etude.tt funn.tt togetherness within.i don't feel it noww.i'm sad.

2005-06-29T21:02:00.000-07:00

ahhhs.cts are eating me.chomp chomp.it's gross.every paper completed leaves me drained.i nv once felt satisfied assured that i'll pull thru.oh wells i shall just laugh at it.

haven't been sleeping well the past few nights.i refuse to believe that the reason i can't get to sleep revolves ard cts.hahas.so er xinss.aft a long hard gross eeky paper,it really helps to be super high.sort of takes away all the frustration.hahas.oh wells.

hist's on fri.talk abt prolonged torture.but i'm thankful for a day off the whole ct rountine.and i badly need the time.

i truly admire those ppl who know what they really want in life.esp if they're in some arty farty,or music related route.breaking away from the norm.it's so nice!so special.admire them for pursuing what they truly what,and not what society wants from them.i support youuu all!!

cheap thrill.hahas.doing sth against the rules and getting away with it.so funn.

lunch was funn todayss.felt like ages since the last time we ate together.it's like a nv before combi.

oh hor!!i caught a girl smuggling kfc into the lib.hahas.so funny.she was trying to eat while reading some notes.i tried to stare at her but apparently i think she didn't feel me staring at her.hahas.

alrightyss.i shld really get back to cold war.aft reading tt pile of eeky notes on cold war,i really feel like laughing at those politicians.they're all acting based on paranoia.and their decisions have so many serious and lasting consequences.look at vietnam.land mines.so appalling!why is force ever an option.guess it's desparation.i shall go back to laughing at those ppl who made the cold war such a comedy.wells.at least to me.

jiayouss for chem ppl!!heys.i know some stuff abt chem tooss.hahas.tea prevents absoprtion of erms,vitamins.and proteins erms,come frm soyabeanss.i feel smart.hohoho.

heyss pigggyy!!don't feel bad abt it.i feel bad tooss.like a lot of stuff clashes and it's always i ps youu.ahhs.let's hope monday will be okss!smilee.

2005-06-24T22:09:00.000-07:00

what's with mugging.why do we have to pull ourselves out of bed each day and face the same old lousy stack of notes.why do we have to commit all those huge chunks of information to memory.why do we even bother to mug.ahhhs.cos we have to.

my neighbour finally stopped drilling.for the past wk it's been eating my nerves.ahhhs.so irritating.it's super loud and it comes every few minutes with increasing loudness.but i'm glad his house is now beauutiful,fixed with a sanyo air con system and yes yes,he has disposed of his drills.yeays.i'm glad.

mugging out's been funn.at least i don't fall asleep.and even if i do,the table isn't half as comfy as my bed.but the guard's quite disturbing.he actually stops at ur table and makes sure that u the reference book u're holding tallies with whatever notes u're taking.wow.and he's fierce.and i realise i give myself away so easily.hahas.ytd when he stopped by our table,in our mad rush to dump reference books onto the table and stash our notes away,i laughed.hahas.even when he was telling us that school books were strictly not allowed.hahas.cheap thrill.

watched wo chai ytd.what an er xin episode.eekss.there was this girl who refused to grow up,and lived in her own world.and yes yes,in her own world,she's the princess.kays.the live in her own world part i can still accept.but aiyoss.she dresses like one too?i mean ok if her dresses are like elegant,nice,sophisticated,and fashioned to fit into this world.but her outfits are scary.the cute-sy little outfits with laces,loads of pink (clarine may kill her),and ughs.just ughss.and she dresses like that to school,and wherever she goes.erms.no comments.

i miss playing on the piano.watching some show featuring little talents made me yearn to attend all the missed piano lessons this past 3yrs all at a go.hahas.scaryss.

identity crisis?how abt u know who u are but u're just not satisfied with it.

glad tt our cg's back.yeayss.we're starting tmr.

raaahhh.

2005-06-17T06:57:00.000-07:00

dear God,i don't want this yr to end.it'll be nice if i cld cont living the way i've lived for the past yr and half.i do love and treasure each and every single person You've placed in my life.don't think it's going to be the same even thou there's such a thing called meet up every now and then and see if everyone's still alive and feeling high.ayess.

i don't know what to say.

2005-06-12T20:56:00.000-07:00

rrraahhh----.

ahhhs.sth wrong's with my msn.eeeeky!!!why am i left with 3contacts noww?ahhhs.and i have to painfully add back every single person back to the list.eeekss youuu msn!!u're horrible!!!and my comp's still weird.ahhhs.why everytime i touch a comp it dies aft a while.eeks comps.rahhhh youuu.

hahas.just needed to grumble rumble and roar.yeays.happy mugging.singapore sale's great.shopping theraphy works.
baaaaaaaaa

ayess --.

2005-06-11T00:59:00.000-07:00

yeayss.i'm like how outdated.everyone more or less talked abt camp alr,then now icky me is doing it.hahas.ayess.but yeayss.my comp's finally back!wheess.i'm glad.it looks normal.no more icky laptop which runs on a 2hr long batt supply.and tt lappy died when i was halfway thru my camp entry a few days ago.it died and my entry died along with it.eekss.

camp was nice.funn.loved the games.wow.games ppl did really well.the flour tested like cereal!!hahas.loved the flour fight thou tt wasn't part of the game.love chopin,esp our cheer thou chopin is how mispronounced in tt cheer.hahas.love the food!!xie xie angela's father!really made the whole food thingy less troublesome and all.the food tasted great!!love the chao fan.hahas.think prolly cos we were too hungry.love the food com ppl tooss.yeayss.making drinks rock.so what if tt teacher didn't dare drink tt lychee drink.hahas.ayess.i think the new band teachers are a lil' weird.like they don't interact much w us.yeays.love the classroom thou it had a lot of icky bugs appearing on the 2nd nite.love ex co games.love malay dance for their make up.love acting as a ghost,it isn't so scary.in short,i think i loved the camp.

pity camp ended a bit off.a bit wrong.i wonder why.i guess we have a lot to learn abt limits.and sometimes reactions tt outweigh the incident are quite scaryss.sorryss!i still feel bad for scolding ppl wrongly.

yeayss.i'm gg to watch pck the musical laterss.funn.i still got a lot of things to say.but i'm caught between a lot of things now.eekss.i hope i don't forget.

mugg with all ur might ppl.wheess.

2005-06-01T07:38:00.000-07:00

yeayss.i'm back frm msia.wheess.hahas.it's been long since i sat on a plane.the feeling of taking off's really great.thou i don't like the fact tt my ears get blocked and i can't hear what ppl are talking about.this trip was really a bonding trip with my family.got to know a lot of family stories.and my beauutiful cousin in penang.he's soooo cute!i miss timothieeeee alr.my grandma is a stubborn lil' girl.and there was this bunch of eeeeky ppl who snatched a cab frm us.still quite appalled by their behaviour and lack of ethics.it's so disgusting how one of them attempted to stand further in front just to grab the cab first.i stared at them but apparently tt wasn't useful.ermmms.hoho.went to our relatives' church on sunday.went to sunday sch with timothy.it's so cute to see all the little children singing and doing actions.sth like gracestar,except tt the songs are in chinese and malay.so cute!!saw this girl who looked similar to me when i was young.hahas.so i decided to befriend her.so cuteeee.suddenly i feel like being a child care teacher like my mom.hahas.and i think my mum misses her job for the 4 days we were in msia.she kept saying things like come let teacher alice help you open,or hold teacher's hand,we're crossing the road.hahas.so funny.ayess.
i missed everyooneee.even thou it's only for 4 days.checked out some places today.ahhhs.when i fell asleep just now,i had an icky dream abt those places.kays.shall admit tt i'm scared.hahas.ahhhs.but i shall try to be brave.
june hols.i can feel tt it isn't going to be enjoyable.
zhiwaye's wedding on sunday!so exciting.
ayess.my comp's not back yet.i miss it.i don't really like using the laptop.the battery runs out every 2hrs and i'm always the last to use.so it's a bit ermms.ahhhs.
watched hot chick ytd.so funny.agree tt some parts were quite crude.but it's just oh so funny.
youu don't need anyone to feel special.all youu need is youu.got tt frm the show.and i think it really does mean sth.wheess.
looking ahead.what do i see.do youuu see what i see.

2005-05-22T03:49:00.000-07:00

haven't updated in quite a while ayess.hahas.my dear computer crashed and died on fri.while i was trying to go online,the cpu suddenly exploded and boomed.what followed after included smoke and a icky smell.hahas.i thought it was funny.anyhowss.my comp's dead so i doubt i'll be coming online tt often.ahhs.i'm feeling deprived alr!using my dad's laptop now.but he's like a bit reluctant to let me use tooss.ahhhss.shall learn to live without technology in the form of a computer for the time being.
shuhui's exhibition//loved it.looking at her drawings i was instantly reminded of my own grandfather.he passed away 11 yrs ago,when i was in pri 1.though i was really young then,i can still remember a lot of things abt him.prolly cos he was the one who was taking care of me,since the day i breathed.i remember him smoking a lot,though he was trying to quit smoking cos of all the health hazards a smoker who pose to a baby - - me tt is.i know he gambled.my dad used to quarrel with him over it.i remember him not paying his debts,and had some strangers appear at my grandparent's house when i was watching a ninja turtle cartoon.but despite all his shortcomings,he was such a loving grandfather.he taught me chinese,sort of made me quite like chinese last time tt is.he always brought me out for walks in the neighbourhood when my grandmother was cooking dinner.he bought me a lot of stuff.i still keep tt pretty unicorn decorated scissors he bought.i brought it to kindergarten one day,and someone stole it.he bought me another one from the provision shop near our house.he plucked out two of my teeth.and he always fed me.kays.i was a spoilt lil' girl.the first time i ate dinner by myself was the first day of his funeral.i don't know why but tt day,it seems that i suddenly matured.i remember refusing to go near his coffin,refusing to look at him.i cried and i made a lot of others cry too.after his burial,i was in my grandma's house and as i was walking down the stairs i saw a glimpse of someone who looked like my grandfather.i screamed ran down the stairs towards tt someone.ayess.what a disappointment.it was my maid.hohoho.i miss my grandfather lots.i know my family does too.i hope tt as he looks down on us from heaven,he'll be smiling too,and knowing how we've grown,how we've changed and i hope i get to meet him when i'm up there too.i love my grandpa.
i admire how shuhui can translate what she feels into clear define strokes.it's just so cool.
shall go off for my crab dinner now.my dad's weird la.hahas.he suddenly feels like eating crab.so eeekss,we gg off for crab nowss.ayess.i don't like to get my hands dirty.i'm lazy.
love talking over the phone.it'll be nice if my ears don't go hot aft talking for too long.it's so irritating.
40dop ended today.so glad to see vonne.and xiaopam's so sweet.yeays.she's starting sch soon,on tue.yeayss.can meet her for lunch finally.hope fel's eyes are better tooss.

i cannot be bought\\purpose-driven\\

yeayss.i love shopping.hahas.and my mummy broke my beauutiful friends light up the day mug.ahhhhs.

2005-05-13T07:36:00.001-07:00

don't like living everyday without a a inviting enough goal to make me want to work towards it.

yeays.i like this song!!it makes me so happy.it's like losing me in its nice sounding tune.listening to it nv fails to make me feel so much better.

everyone's sick again.i wonder why.feel so so guilty whenever i hear ppl cough when we stop playing.it's like continuous and it sounds so painful.i always get the impression that the ppl behind me are coughing their lungs out.scary.i think it's time they all say hi to a doctor.

i want to learn to play the cello.it's so beauutiful.love it's sound.

what happens aft?hahas.i really don't know.

college day pracs make me tired.booss.

ha.my dad was filing some tax form thing when he commented that what he earns in a yr doesn't match up to what the pm earns in a month.he was feeling sad and not high abt it.hahas.but daddy!!i think we're so comfortable.we don't need a big car because there's only 3 of us.i don't need pretty clothes because the ones i have are pretty enough.i don't need air con cause i can live with my noisy small mitsibishi fan.i don't need high tech stuff cos i won't know how to use them.so see.we don't need a pm's salary to live happily.i owe my mum her mothers' day present.ayess.hahas.i think i can combine it with her birthday present alr.

one day i shall explore singapore.shall visit the east south and north.

i want to see a beauutiful rainbow.i want to be at the interchange at night,and talk till it's relatively late and then go home feeling happy.

my maid has a handphone.hahas.she's so funky.

//ayess youu.don't hold on to the mentality that u'll not be happy kays.discard it!it has no place in ur life.whatever it is you know that there will always be ppl who will be there.u are normal.everyone's different in their own ways.i laugh at the wrong things.opposing views are aye ok.don't have to argue.accept listen.makes everything easier on youu.think lazy.hahas.then won't want to waste ur breath to argue le.smile and love urself for who you are.//

joster!get well noww!\\pig!stop sleeping.it's 10 alr.hahas.

2005-05-08T06:39:00.000-07:00

still feeling so over the moon over it.yeays.we did itss.thank God for seeing us all thru it all.so nice.it really helps when youu keep ur focus on nice happy thoughts.God is just so good.there are many other things that aren't left for anyone to decide.

i'm not exactly a good reactor.

yeays.we're starting this new thing.it's quite exciting.like having a cg within a big organisation.wheess.funnss.but what happened on sat sort of signalled the possible scenarios that might happen.ah wells.i believe.

i'm so sorry for what happened on fri.ayess.ya.just sorry.

parade.wow wee.not interested.

sometimes i just don't feel like going home.cos once i reach home i know where my more happening life fades away and i have to revert to being a icky mugging caterpillar.eekss.can i not.

2005-05-03T07:45:00.000-07:00

thur's the day.i'm bursting with excitment.i hope everyone is tooss.let's make everyone in the hall sit up and listen to us with their mouths wide open.let's stun every single living creature in the hall.yeayss.let's reach for it.
i want to commit it all into His hands.
wheess.focus on good thoughts,breathe like youu nv breathed in air before.we have lungs as big as a whale and diaphragms as strong as steel.we feel like we nv felt before.we play because now's our turn to shine.go go go njcsb!wheess.

2005-04-22T07:12:00.000-07:00

Stand up tall, wipe away your tears and never give up.

i hope this encourages.i really hope it does.

2005-04-13T07:49:00.000-07:00

i didn't know it'll have such a big impact la.anyhowss i hope i made someone see things in a more positive point of view.i hope you're happyss.wheess.concert was fantastic.i didn't know what to feel.ppl might feel inspired to work super hard aft the concert and all.i missed the cue-ss the moving the watch-ss the clean clear strokes.move on estherss.don't really know.but i really think cue-ing helps a lot.and it looks super impressive.so maybe like sometime soon shall we all move and cue?wheess.saw wenjiess aft the concert.wheess.i missed wenjiess.he met eng wah.and i finally knew who eng guan was.wheess.they look alike,cos they're brothers.wheess.bu hao xiaoss.hahas.i was tired but happyss.
yeays.finally knew how serene centre is like.wheess.there're really nice shops there.yeays.what pigsyss said made sense.it made me think tooss.and also what happened the day before.there are a lot of things we may not know.how what we said affected ppl our actions the way we try to avoid stuff and the significance of it all.scaryss.don't worryss.i won't change.hahas.sounds bad thou.i didn't know bread was so heavy.got scolded.ahhs.well wells.it's impractical?sometimes i think dee and mee make the weirdest suggestions but ah wells,i still love them.
so coincidental.quite funny.taking a step back helps.i thank those who made me laugh despite it all.i apologise for looking like a bitter gourd /acting like an old grouchy aunty selling stale fish/forcing ppl to eat bread/direct and for being a small goldfish with no mouth.i apologise for the lack of it the horrible twangss.yeays.20odd days left.i don't want to ruin it.the word sounded like a joke to me.but i see things in a different light now.what happened to the more i put myself down the more i want to prove to myself tt it's not the case mentality.it's time to come back.
supposedly day10 but i'm still at day7.ahhs.discipline.playing this wk.it's been a long time.commit it to God.

rah -.

2005-04-10T05:10:00.000-07:00

it's been so long since i did gracestar.and when i did it today it was really great.a brand new experience.hahas.the chinese version of woohoo was cool.try doing the actions while singing chinese.hohoho.not easy la.the kids were so so cutess.esp the nursery kids.i'm sure God must have been really pleased when He saw them singing with all their might,with all the air in their lungs,and with their eyes closed.i'm so glad thou the team wasn't more than complete we managed to do itss.small but mighty.i'm so hooked on to this.

we are all small,but mighty.

pracs.wheess.i quite like the nie band room.the ceiling's so high and i always wonder what's beyond tt not so high ceiling portion.but i can't see itss!nvmss.shall figure it out before we move to another room.syf is gg to be funn.air is free.relaxing is good.yeays.we can do itss.i hope i don't let ppl down.i pray for confidence and nice good healthy lungs reeds and a meimei non-leaky bassoon.and i believe.

i have a lot to learn frm ants tt live out their purpose,and frm birds tt fly and chirp.

i'm blessed.so glad to have ppl ard me.i'm happy.life is simple and it is only temporary.wheess.
smile!ur not on candid camera!hohoho.bu hao xiaoss.

2005-04-08T07:15:00.000-07:00

wheess.i'm happyss.
i guess sometimes i just get too paranoid.hahas.life is simple.wheess.and it makes me happy.i'm really fortunate.in more ways than one.
wheess.

2005-04-05T07:44:00.000-07:00

why do i get the feeling that what i see is not what it really is.because i'm right.at least i guess i'm right.ha.i'm childish.i was trying to will a tummy upset to make me run to the toilet and skip a part of it.hahas.i think it's funny.maybe if i'm stronger willed tmr it'll work.hohoho.
i know.but i won't say.hide and seek.police and thief.hunter and the hunted.wheess.i found nth.awkward hahas.
the new wood stuff came.tastes like wood.not good.normal.sucky.electric guitar.dispersed.in short,condemned.
death.sad.sunday visit.burst blood vessel.grand-daughter.touched.hollow body.byebye soul.hello heaven.it's a beautiful place.
drizzle.i learnt.standing.bold.tall.alone.talked.nice.good.not bad.
hot.bored.it's nice to move my mouth.words that come out.laughed.
not full.air is free.relax.mysterious.i don't feel it.
estherss was happy for a silly reason.

fall like fire.soak like rain.i will never be the same again.
40days.day3

2005-04-01T05:02:00.000-08:00

dear God,it's me estherss.why do ppl feel sad.why can't we be happy everyday.and if we can't why do i try to be happy and try to make ppl be happy every single day.i hope everyone lead happy lives.why is it that we can't always be that happy all the time.wells.i guess when things don't go the way we expect it to be we feel disappointed.sadness sets in.i don't like being sad.so i'll try to be happy.but i nv realised that by trying to be happy i'm not actually helping much.eloquence,courage.seems so out of place.i guess they left.the beginining and the end.it's like telling a child a story.i won't stop believing that the world is a happy place,that ppl have a lot of happy potential in them.i like it when we laugh.we bypass all reason and logic.say hohohoho.

i really don't treat u as one.cos i know it feels terrible to be treated like tt.i was once thought of in the same way.it's horrible.the way ppl take u for granted,treat u more like some cartoon character that tickles their funny bones than for who you really are.i don't like it.and i doubt anyone likes it at all.

we all have 5senses.it's time i used my skin.tooters do not use their skins much.

i need to come out frm tt hole.ah wells.the journey will be long.i need to climb over small mountains swim across murky ponds.i hope i see ur beauutiful red/lime green light tooss.it's dim frm where i am now,but i know i'll see it glowing againss.
i miss old traditional humjipengss.i don't like new flavour because nth's as good as the good old traditional one.

hello new hair do.hello to horrible Os.hello to no-s.hello to explanations.
tatas confusion.tatas television.tatas doing what i want.
i splurged.not good.
1234123412341234

2005-03-31T07:28:00.001-08:00

i don't like guessing.and i'm not good with words either.i'm toot,and i simply lack the courage to ask.i'm good at running away.it doesn't help but at least i avoid situations.but i know it's really horrid to run away.

i hope i don't let ppl down.yeays.i hope everything goes well.12341234.yeays.wheess.

bye bye long hair.i'm cutting my hair to save my bald spot.wheess.

2005-03-25T05:45:00.000-08:00

yeays.it feels good to be not at the desk everyday,reading the endless pile of notes.wheess.i'm happy.was harrassed by a bee during hist paper.i was so scared la.it suddenly appeared beside me while i was trying to spin my own version of vietnam's history.was trying to inch away frm it.realised tt beess have really long and skinny legs.hist was terrible.kays.my boo boo for starting the day before only.i have a tendency of getting really aunty when i'm stressed.bad.thank God for seeing me through the cts!yeays.results shall be another issue altogether.ahhs.it's so true tt ppl don't like to have the truth in their face.told mummy and daddy tt i didn't touch 20marks in physics,and they were like saying that i didn't try hard enough,not starting earlier and all.ya.kays.i didn't like hearing it esp since i pia-ed for it.but it was all last minute.ahhs.i'm such a lazy bum.

ahhs.i typed and it all disappeared.raah.

i'm lazy.anyhoos.ms congeniality's super funny.everyone shld watch.
watched this tv prog tt made me want to be a social worker more than ever.i love God i love my parents and i love people.

i need to do something.i don't know what.

i felt mature for a while.

i hope everything's going well.got sabo-ed at curry wok todayss.ahhas.the uncle and aunty are good actors.must go forward not backward ya.wheess

we love because You first loved us.

2005-03-17T19:31:00.000-08:00

mugg mugg mugg.

mugging makes a person anti-social.

mugg mugg mugg.

wheess.it'll be over in a wk.yeays.wheess.

ahhs.i just so bored.i don't like waking up to books notes and pencils.it's so boring.and i'm not exactly productive.just sleeping a lot.watching a lot of television,and coming online much more than i shld.boredom really kills.maybe it's just me.
saw a lot of stuff on my way home tt day.surprisingly,i'm enjoying bus rides alone.wheess.i get to observe a lot of stuff and think abt a lot of things.funnss.there are a lot of things to look forward to.yeays.i think it's time i look at that horrid stack of notes againss.wheess.

2005-03-14T19:40:00.000-08:00

i'm supposed to be mugging for cts.but hohoho,what am i doing wasting my time online.oh wells.i will get back to studing later onss.ugh.i love the shorter time table.but it makes me so happy i forget that i shld be studying and doing work given the extra time,instead of running elsewhere and partying my time away.wells.i need to have a bit more of self discipline.ritess.

had physics make up.reached sch so so early.yeays for kevin.went into the range.oh mans.it's so cool la.and they get to scroll the score card to where they are.they've got a table for them to do work tooss.just like the band room.but i think the range's a lot cleaner.kays.i think it's time to do sth again.boos.and they've got photos on the walls too.it's so nice.i like the band room the way it is now.it appears more spacious thou the smell and the dust's still there.but i still like itss!wheess.make up ended early.was feeling a little sad for myself cos i thought i wld have to stay in sch and mugg alone.there's really nth wrong with it.but i just don't like being alone.wells.sometimes at least.being alone scares me.it's so boring!yeays for dear who had choir later on.wheess.we went holland v.wheess.subway was so filling.we ate the foot long sub meal thingy.the cookies were so nice.we were supposed to study a little,but we ended up talking.hahas.went back to sch.yeays for the side gate and uncle william!hahas.he's so cutess la.sat down at the old folk's home lookalike benches and talked again.hahas.it's so nice to know her more todayss.hope her workshop turns out funn.wheess.
bobo took the winds and percus today.he took us well.yepps.really.realise that he knows a lot of stuff and the way he gets us to achieve sth is yepps,in my point of view,not bad.wheess.he shld take the band a lil more often urhss.i think the percus were getting a lil' bored.oh wells.mingss told me abt the brasses sect.hahas.i think it's so funny la.and all the broken pencils.they went for ice cream.but it was getting a bit too latess for me.yeays for zhiyongss who took 157 with me.deon's dad came to fetch him.sixun's away at kayaking.wheess.hope she has funn.

i felt a lil' silly when i recounted it.hahas.it's really dumb when i step back and think abt it.hahas.it's just so dumb.hahas.i shall laugh at it.

2005-03-12T22:29:00.000-08:00

i have to work harder.there's always sth holding me back.is it the lack of discipline or seriousness.it's so different.used to be so scared whenever i couldn't deliver it properly.and when circumstances forced me to do so,i could,thou i was afriad and all.but the thing was,i managed to pull it off.now it's so different.it's gross.i cannot bring myself to face them.it's not embarrassing.it's knowing that while others are putting in so much effort into it,and that you are the one spoiling the whole thing.it's disgusting and terrible.better do sth about it,and i know i can't rely on myself to do tt.and it's approaching.i know i'll be really scared.but i guess running away doesn't solve anything.i need to face it.

went to nus with adess,pkss,emmss,thomass and his friend ytd.everyone looked so grown up.kays.all of us except pkss and thomass's friend were in sch uni.and my tian arh,i felt more like a sec4 kid then a yr2.everyone there was in home clothes,and like so many girls were in heels.not that i see the need to wear heels.i mean.ya.some were clearly overdressed.but i just couldn't help staring and looking.they looked so so mature.met meow there tooss.she was going for the med talk.the talk i wanted to attend was over.so i basically went ard taking a lot of brochures and koping a lot of other stuff.going into the uni scares me.kays.that is,if i can get into one,in the first place.it's scary.i don't even know if there'll be a class,or if anyone i know is going into the same course as me,the new people i'll meet and all.so gross.i'm really scared.i know it's dumb la.but ya.hahas.ah wells.for now.let's just all mug and be happy muggers till the As are over.

wheess.my cousin's married today!!sort of makes me wished i was getting married tooss.hahas.wheess.and the hotel even gave them this free poster thingy with their photo on it.so coolss!and his bride's jie mei-s forgot to close the door,so all the xiong di-s rushed into the house without having to do any forfeit and all.hahas.so dumb.and i'm going to become an ah-yi soon.my eldest cousin's wife is pregnant!wheess.happy family.

2005-03-07T06:59:00.000-08:00

wheess.i'm so so happy.even as i look at the mei mei photos i feel like jumping up and down,screaming,shouting and laughing all at the same time.hahas.it'll be a horrible sight.but oh wellss.hahas.i'm just so happy.i'm so glad it's over,that everything went well.i thank God for overseeing it all,and seeing me through it all.i'm so glad so many thousand ppl turned up.so glad that the band fund isn't depleted aft the dinner.so glad that everyone was so high thou the food,wells,is another issue altogether.so so glad that we all took photos,we had mikes,karaoke,sections to sit with,seniors to catch up with,people and wheess.i'm just so glad.i love the band to bits and pieces.and my dearest section.hohoho.we finally took the wait for 10over yrs photo urh.and i love my kong long camera.so glad for the two fantastic emcees,jas and xunss.for shujun who was so encouraging with her actions and her words.yes yes.i'm so glad it's all over.learnt a couple of stuff here and there.realised that i really need to grow up.hahas.but oh wells.took loads of photos with my precious kong long cam.didn't really eat much,a bit not worth my 30bucks.but i totally enjoyed the company i had.the nice toilet music.the bobbing,singing,talking,snapping,laughing and getting all high.i drank champagne tooss.hahas.and it doesn't taste nice.
i love the ex co tooss.they're so great.i love xiaomingss xunss and adeess too.i'm so glad for ppl like them who are so so nice and enthu and supportive.wheess.i'm just so over the moon.i hope everyone had as much fun.this is a lousy entry with a lot of i-s in it.hahas.but i can't help it,i'm just so happy!!
yes yes.glad that the seniors got good results tooss.it sort of makes me worry for myself nxt yr.scary.and cts are in 2wks.i'm gg to become a mugger.at least for the nxt 2wks.i need it.boos.sigh.no more lazing ard u lazy piggy pooo.
and i went for a wedding dinner on sunday.my tian arhss.the menu was exactly the same as the one we had on sat la.hahas.and i was telling my family that the nxt dish wld be blah blah bleh,and woohooss,blah blah bleh was nxt.hahas.
kays.let's all mugg and be happy muggers with nice and happy lives.i'm happy,i'm glad and i'm so blessed.wheess.

2005-03-02T07:19:00.000-08:00

happy birthday sista!!hahas.think we left her out a bit cos we were too busy planning all her surprises and all.hahas.hope she enjoyed her birthday!!and yeays,i hope she wears the pretty pink and white bikini!hahas.mans.gg into tt shop to buy was totally embarrassing.the saleslady kept asking me if i was buying it for myself.hahas.a bit erpss.
anyhows.i realised that part of it lies with me.ya.the lack of it,and prolly overestimation of certain things.i'm glad things sort of worked out.i hope everything will.can't wait for it to be over and done with.thank God for His providence tooss.so so glad hist essay's postponed to the nxt wk.it's such a killer.but yeays,i've got more time to conquer itss.whoopee.

i hope everyone gets in.i hope a cut off point doesn't exist.i hope everyone will be happy with the end result.i hope things will remain the same.if not,i'll miss them terribly.it's so true.you never know how precious something means to you till you realise that it's slipping out between your fingers,and you can't do anything to help.sadss.i wish i could.i wish i could help everyone.i wish for everyone to be happy.wheess.then everyone will be happy and everyone will dream wonderful dreams at night.if only.but i think i'm hoping for things that will nv happen.sadss.

2005-02-27T06:34:00.000-08:00

yeays.it's almost over.i must have looked and acted like some bittergourd for the past wk.so sorryss.hahas.so glad for those people who showed their support in their own little ways.yeays.i feel touched.wheess.thank you youss!i'm happy.
Os results are out tmr!how excitingss.hopefully the yr1s get super good results and they'll stay in nj.i'll miss them!!i love my yr1s!they're prolly the most fun bunch of strangers i met this yr.woohoos.hahas.i'll really miss them.ah wells.shall see how their results go.
talentime was quite cool.woohoos.in the secret just rocks.mr koh's band was hmms,good.but sorrys,he was a bit the stealing the limelight urh.anyhows.it was not too bad.and yeays.happy birthday debbiess!!
academically i think i'm failing.it's sadss.kays.i don't think i am.i am failing.i better buck up mans.ugh.i'm feeling gan jiong cos i'm not feeling anything.ho ho ho.
just realised how fast this yr will pass.better start to take a lot of photos and remember everyone in my beautiful lil' world.wheess.

2005-02-24T01:49:00.000-08:00

disgusted.the lack of enthusiasm.but how can i blame them?the price is steep,but heys,it's in a hotel.ugh.i was so irritated.can't imagine a grp of so many and yet only a super small fraction of them are actually going.it's really not funny.i'm not tickled.and then suddenly a hotel wasn't actually necessary.so it's back to the trusty old yellow pages again urh.it's not funn.i don't think i have the right to complain since i'm supposed to do it.i don't like crying in front of ppl.it's embarrassing and i look terribly ugly.just so irritated and pissed.it's hard trying to acede to everyone's wants.this that that and this.
i know it's important but i feel that some stuff shldn't be neglected as well.i feel sad for them.really.they have nth much worth remembering do they?sometimes i get irritated by the constant talk abt tt issue,but then i realise that it's what we went in there to do ritess.and it'll be an achievement.but we're humans afterall.things shldn't just revolve ard just what's required.hello are we missing out on other things.we have 5senses don't we.how about using more of our skin?raaah.i think it's just as important as trying to master yes yes,the oh-so-important issue.i wonder if they feel welcomed.i hope everyone feels a part of the whole thing.not being left behind and all.maybe i'm using too much of my skin.but ah wells,i'm just grouchy now.raah.
so so glad for them all.especially nicoless.someone who went thru the same whole traumatic experience.it feels super good being understood.i hope everything goes well.meanwhile say helloss to yellow pages.
glad to know that it exist.

2005-02-18T07:00:00.000-08:00

i was nv in so much pain.ytd was terrible.was perspiring in an air con room.i was so freaked out.wanted to puke so much.i was so so scared.hahas.now i wantss to laugh at what i was thinking when i was in pain.it's just so funny and far too paiseh to be told.hahas.anyhows,thank God that it's all over now.yeays.wanted to get blue slip but there really wasn't a point in doing so la.my mum was working and i don't have a habit of bringing my keys out on a sch day.skipped gp and slept in the band room.it's so quiet and nice.wheess.ahhs.i feel so bad towards sista and hq la.so so sorry.i must have been the worst looking block of wood.yeays.so glad for those who provided comfort in a way or another.yeays.
ahhs.i so embarrassed la.can't imagine myself losing my sch bag.hahas.ahhs.now the whole gp class must think that i'm some muddle head la.ahhs.anyhows i found it.yeays.i love my beauutiful bag.wheess.
went out with sista today after school.it's been long since i went out with her alone.i love the bus journey thou we both felt like puking.a lot of things have changed.wells.life moves on.but it's always nice to think back and wonder what it'll be like if things didn't change.
watched the next action star.hahas.it's so funny.the way the contestants argue,and talking bad about fellow contestants in front of the cam.hahas.competition just brings out the ugly side of people urh.extreme makeover was quite cool tooss.the lady's story was quite sad.like how she always excluded herself frm sch activities,sought refuge at home,just cos of the way she looks.at the end of the show she looked so different,and so much better.hope she finds a lot more confidence in facing people.wheess.

quite _ _ _ e the i_e_ _ _ _ _ t _a_ _ _ _ l _e_d_ _g t_ _s
hope sista enjoys tmr tooss

2005-02-16T06:13:00.000-08:00

my new favourite colour's not here.wheess.i'm just a bitss boredss.i sound depressed.hahas.but i'm not.wheess.i'm so high today.thou i was late again.i shall try very hard not be late for morning assemblies anymore.yeppies.will make it a pt not to.ahhs.skill c was terrible as usual.wasn't focusing much.thinking abt the morning.how wonderful it was to lie in bed and sleep and dream of nice and happy dreams.hahas.ya right.
i'm high.wheess.i was so glad we were playing the back few pages today.woots.so high!!makes me so excited.hahas.wheess.and my tongue got cut.hahas.and my reed was red.quite scary.but it was quite funny.couldn't really feel anything thou.wheess.i love the lww ppl!!yeays.hahas.
is it a sign of us all growing older or is it normal.like how we always look back and recount endlessly abt tt time where we so and so and so.and then we'll always laugh at the same place and add the same comments.hahas.it sounds exactly what older ppl do ritess?like look back at the gd old times and all.hahas.
and linxinsss's so nice!her cookies are just so so so so nice and fantastic.and the ribbon.hahas.all the effort in writing those stuff on it!and yes yes.the super nice letter!!hahas.and yes yes,it's very long.wheess.i'm a happy girl.hahas.thank youss linxinss.
hahas.i loved the bus journey today.i loved the bumps,how we bounced up.hahas.it's like reliving my sch bus experience.wheess.

see things through the eyes of a child

2005-02-14T06:49:00.000-08:00

oh wells.they don't have my new favourite colour in here.hahas.but this is close to it.wheess.it's valentines day again.it's kind of dead this yr.no atmosphere at all in sch.prolly cos it's a monday.all that icky monday blues and all.but still the sch wasn't pinkish or redish enough.so so erps,colourless.anyhows.yeays to the stuff i gave away and received.i loved the hairpins i made la,but they all thought they looked like capacitors.ah wells.and so many ppl can bake!i wanted to bake tooss.but my house's without an oven,without flour,baking soda,vanilla essence and what have you-s.and i ya,can't really bake.wheess.and i like the nice yam yam-s.ho ho ho.yeays.happy valentines day!!yeays.

eew.pe tmr.booos.

sometimes it's hard to find the right words to say.i was nv good at comforting or advising.and i feel bad when i can't say sth clever to make stuff a lil' better.i guess i'll have to learn.words are so so powerful.they can kill.

2005-02-10T05:42:00.000-08:00

a lot of drama rama in action nowadays urh.it's quite funny.depending on how you see it.funny as in hilarious,ha ha funny.it's so so funny.the way ppl react.and how distorted a lot of things become after it all.i like cirlces.wheess.every thing comes a full round.you'll get back to where you started from.yeays.
watched a midnight show with my cousins.so funn!hahas.i do i do is such a great show!wheess.so so funny.i laughed.at the reality of some stuff.laughed at the lives of the characters.indirectly,at our lives.so funny.all the jokes about the government.how reality slaps you in the face.hahas.it's just so funny.plus all the hokkien added in here and there.in a way it's crude,but it's just so singapore.i love that show!!wheess.
boos.i got scolded today.prolly it's time i learnt to be a lil' less optimistic.
i got a lil' scared when i saw my granddad.he's 90.he's stubborn.he doesn't like being told what to do.he doesn't believe in doctors,and his walking stick.

2005-02-03T07:52:00.000-08:00

ebloggy was irritating me.everything was irritating me.history was gross.sch was so routine i was so irritated.
but yeays,i finished my history essay.i shall celebratess now.wheess.
loads of stuff have changed since the day ebloggy decided to give up on all its loyal bloggers and just refused to be revived again.being passive isn't good.
i wantss to tryss to be anti for a day.i wonder what it's like to spend the whole day alone.a bit scaryss.but it sounds exciting.i haven't tried before.wheess.oh mans.i just can't help feeling so happy cos my hist's finally over and done with.yeays yeays yeays.